Britain has a long and complicated legal history, which means some truly bizarre laws have stuck around over the years.
While many of these old-fashioned rules are rarely enforced (mostly because it’s unlikely that most police know about them!), they technically remain part of UK legislation. Some are outdated remnants from centuries ago, while others are oddly specific and surprisingly still applicable today. From weird rules about handling salmon in suspicious circumstances or paying with your phone at a drive-through, these laws are a hilarious reminder of Britain’s quirky legal past.
1. It’s illegal to be drunk in a pub.
Going to the pub for a few drinks is a major part of British culture, but technically, it’s against the law to be drunk in one. The Licensing Act 1872 states that it’s an offence to be “drunk on licensed premises,” meaning you could, in theory, be fined for having too much of a good time in your local. The law was originally introduced to tackle public drunkenness, which was seen as a major issue in Victorian Britain. While it’s rarely enforced, the law is still technically in place. In reality, you’re more likely to be asked to leave rather than be arrested for being tipsy. However, if someone gets disorderly or causes trouble while drunk in a pub, the law could still be used against them. It’s a strange contradiction, given that pubs exist to serve alcohol, but legally speaking, being too drunk inside one is not allowed.
2. It’s an offence to handle salmon in suspicious circumstances.
One of the strangest laws still on the books comes from the Salmon Act 1986, which makes it illegal to handle salmon in “suspicious circumstances.” While it might sound like a joke, the law was introduced to crack down on the illegal trade of salmon and prevent fish poaching. The vague wording leaves a lot open to interpretation, but essentially, it’s designed to stop people from dealing in illegally caught or stolen fish. Although the law is rarely enforced in everyday life, it technically means that if you’re caught carrying salmon in a way that seems dodgy, you could be in trouble. Of course, for the average person buying fish from the supermarket, there’s no need to worry. But if you ever find yourself carrying a salmon in an unusual situation, just know the law isn’t necessarily on your side.
3. It’s illegal to fly a kite in a way that annoys other people.
Flying a kite might seem like a harmless pastime, but according to the Town Police Clauses Act 1847, it’s actually illegal if it causes annoyance to others. The law was originally put in place to prevent public disturbances and to ensure that activities in public spaces didn’t become a nuisance to pedestrians or property owners. While you’re unlikely to get in trouble for flying a kite in the park, if it’s deemed to be a disturbance — maybe blocking roads, hitting people, or generally being a nuisance — then you could technically be breaking the law. It’s a good reminder that even the most innocent activities can have unexpected legal consequences.
4. It’s illegal to wear a suit of armour in Parliament.
Dating back to 1313, an ancient law still forbids Members of Parliament from wearing suits of armour inside the Houses of Parliament. This law was originally introduced to prevent armed conflicts from breaking out during political debates and to maintain order within government meetings. While it’s clearly not an issue today, the law has never been officially repealed, meaning that technically, if an MP decided to turn up in full medieval armour, they’d be breaking the law. Given how heated political debates can get, maybe it’s a good thing this rule is still in place, just in case.
5. Carrying a plank along a pavement is against the law.
According to the Metropolitan Police Act 1839, it’s illegal to carry a plank along a pavement in London. The law was put in place to prevent obstructions and ensure pedestrian safety, as carrying large objects through busy streets could pose a hazard to others. Although the rule made sense at the time, it’s not exactly relevant to modern life. However, because it has never been officially scrapped, carrying a plank in public in certain areas could still technically be considered a legal offence. So if you ever need to transport wood through London, you might want to think twice about how you do it.
6. Jumping the queue in a Tube station is a crime.
In Britain, queueing is almost sacred, and in some cases, breaking the unspoken rules of waiting in line isn’t just frowned upon, it’s actually illegal. Transport for London has specific bylaws that make it an offence to jump the queue at Tube stations. The rule is in place to maintain order and fairness in busy public transport areas. While you won’t be thrown in jail for pushing ahead in a queue, you could technically be fined if caught skipping the line at ticket machines or barriers. So next time you’re tempted to cut in during rush hour, just remember — it’s not just rude, it’s actually against the law.
7. It’s illegal to shake or beat a carpet in the street.
Under the Metropolitan Police Act 1839, it’s illegal to shake or beat any carpet, rug, or mat in the street. The only exception is doormats, which are allowed to be beaten before 8 a.m. This law was originally introduced to prevent dust and debris from spreading onto roads and pavements. While most people clean their carpets indoors these days, the law remains in effect. Technically, if you decided to shake out a dusty rug on the pavement, you could still be breaking this obscure rule. Luckily, it’s not something police are actively enforcing.
8. It’s illegal to linger near a churchyard after a funeral.
Another little-known law makes it an offence to loiter near a churchyard after a funeral has taken place. This rule was originally introduced to prevent disturbances or potential misconduct during or after funeral services. While it’s hard to imagine anyone being arrested for standing too long outside a church, the law still exists. Whether it was meant to stop troublemakers or just ensure respect for the dead, it remains one of Britain’s stranger legal hangovers.
9. It’s illegal to use your phone to pay at a drive-through while the engine is running.
Using a handheld phone while driving is illegal in the UK, and this rule extends to paying with your phone at a drive-through while your engine is still running. Even if your car is stationary, the law still considers it to be an offence if you’re using your phone behind the wheel. While it may seem overly strict, this law is in place to ensure drivers aren’t distracted. The safest way to avoid a fine? Put the handbrake on, turn off the engine, and then use your phone to pay. It might sound excessive, but technically, that’s what the law requires.
10. It’s an offence to walk a cow through the street during daylight hours.
According to the Metropolitan Streets Act 1867, it’s illegal to walk cattle through the streets between 10 a.m. and 7 p.m. without permission. This law was introduced to prevent congestion in cities when livestock transportation was more common. Although it’s unlikely to affect many people today, it does mean that if you ever find yourself herding cows through the city, you’ll need to do it early in the morning or after sunset — otherwise, you could technically be breaking the law.
