We all like to think we can tell our friend everything, but everyone has a few skeletons in their closet.
It’s part of being human. While we’re not advocating for snooping, sometimes there are subtle signs that your friends might be holding back more than you realise. Here are a few possibilities to ponder…
1. Their stories sometimes have inconsistencies.
Source: Pexels Ever noticed a friend’s story about a wild weekend doesn’t quite add up? Or perhaps the details of their job change a bit each time they tell it. It might be harmless embellishment, but it could also be a hint they’re concealing something they’d rather not share.
2. They suddenly become evasive about certain topics.
Maybe they used to be an open book about their love life, but now they clam up whenever you ask. Or perhaps they get defensive when you inquire about their family. Sudden changes in conversational patterns could signal a hidden struggle or secret they’re not ready to reveal.
3. They have a secret social media account you don’t know about.
We all have our online personas, but a completely separate account your friend keeps under wraps might be more than just a “finsta” for silly photos. It could be a place where they express a different side of themselves, one they’re not comfortable sharing with their wider circle.
4. They exhibit unusual behaviours or habits.
Have they become more secretive about their phone or computer usage? Are they suddenly disappearing for hours without explanation? These out-of-character behaviours could be signs they’re dealing with something they’re not ready to discuss openly.
5. They seem to be living a double life.
They might present one image to you and your group of friends but behave entirely differently when they think no one’s watching. Perhaps they have a hidden hobby, a secret relationship, or even a completely different lifestyle that they’re keeping under wraps.
6. They often make excuses for their behaviour.
If they’re constantly coming up with elaborate explanations for their actions or choices, it might be a way of masking a deeper truth. Pay attention to patterns of excuses – they might reveal a hidden insecurity, fear, or secret they’re trying to protect.
7. Their mood swings are extreme and unpredictable.
Everyone has their ups and downs, but if your friend’s moods seem to fluctuate wildly without explanation, it could be a sign of an underlying issue they’re struggling with. Sudden bursts of anger, unexplained sadness, or withdrawal could be indicative of a hidden emotional burden.
8. They express a lot of guilt or shame.
If they often seem to be apologising for no apparent reason or expressing feelings of guilt or shame, it might be a clue that they’re carrying a secret that weighs heavily on their conscience. They might not be ready to confess, but their emotional state could be a hint that something is amiss.
9. They avoid talking about their past.
Everyone has a past, but if your friend is particularly resistant to discussing theirs, it might raise some eyebrows. Perhaps they’ve had experiences they’re not proud of, traumas they’re still healing from, or secrets they’re afraid to reveal. Their reluctance to open up could be a sign that their past is more complex than they let on.
10. They have unexplained financial difficulties.
Source: Unsplash Money troubles are a common source of stress and secrecy. If your friend is suddenly struggling financially or their spending habits seem out of character, it might be a sign that they’re dealing with a hidden financial burden. This could range from debt to a gambling addiction, or even supporting a secret family or lifestyle.
11. They’re overly protective of their privacy.
Source: Unsplash While everyone deserves a certain level of privacy, if your friend is excessively guarded about their personal life, it might raise suspicions. They might refuse to let you see their phone, be vague about their whereabouts, or get defensive when you ask simple questions. This extreme secrecy could be a sign they’re hiding something they don’t want you to know.
12. They have a history of lying or deception.
If you’ve caught your friend in lies before, it’s natural to be more cautious about trusting their word. Even small lies can destroy trust, and a pattern of deception could indicate a deeper issue. It’s important to establish healthy boundaries and communicate your concerns if you feel like your friend is being dishonest.
13. You sense a disconnect between their words and actions.
Sometimes, our intuition picks up on subtle cues that something’s not quite right. If your friend’s words and actions don’t seem to align, or if you feel like they’re not being entirely truthful, trust your gut feeling. It might be a sign that they’re hiding something or struggling with an internal conflict.
14. You’ve heard rumours or whispers from other people.
Source: Unsplash While gossip isn’t always reliable, if you hear consistent rumours or whispers about your friend from multiple sources, it might be worth paying attention. Don’t jump to conclusions, but keep your eyes and ears open for any additional clues that might confirm or dispel these rumours.
15. Your friendship feels one-sided.
Source: Pexels A healthy friendship involves mutual support, trust, and open communication. If you feel like you’re the only one sharing your thoughts and feelings, or if your friend always seems to have an excuse for not being there for you, it might be a sign that they’re not fully invested in the relationship. While everyone goes through busy periods, a consistent lack of reciprocity could indicate a deeper issue.
