Just because someone seems super friendly and open doesn’t mean they’re a good person.
They might put on a mask when chatting to you and act like they’re your friend, but the minute you leave the room, they’ll be saying some not-so-flattering things about you to anyone within earshot. Here’s how you know you’re dealing with this sort of Jekyll & Hyde. If many of these seem familiar, you may want to be wary in their presence!
1. They’re overly complimentary.
If their compliments feel excessive or exaggerated, it might be a way to cover up other intentions. People who flatter too much can sometimes be trying to distract you from the fact that they don’t actually like or respect you as much as they say they do.
2. They’re always “forgetting” to invite you.
Even though they act friendly, they might conveniently leave you out of group plans or social events. When it becomes a pattern, it could mean they’re excluding you on purpose, despite being nice to your face.
3. They keep bringing up your mistakes.
If someone regularly “reminds” you of past errors or embarrassments, it might not be as innocent as it seems. Constantly highlighting your slip-ups could be a way to subtly put you down while appearing friendly and “honest.”
4. Their body language doesn’t match their words.
Sometimes, people’s expressions and gestures reveal more than they mean to. If they’re smiling while subtly rolling their eyes or crossing their arms, it might indicate they’re not as pleased with you as they’re trying to show.
5. They’re quick to gossip about other people with you.
People who regularly gossip to you about other people might also be talking about you when you’re not there. If they’re eager to share dirt on everyone else, there’s a good chance you’re not excluded from their private criticisms.
6. They’re never happy for your successes.
Someone who secretly dislikes you might struggle to celebrate your achievements. They might give you a weak congratulations or quickly change the subject. Their lack of enthusiasm can show their real feelings, even if they’re smiling on the outside.
7. They give you “compliments” that feel like digs.
If their praise feels like it has a hidden edge, it could be a sign of insincerity. Comments like “You’re surprisingly good at that” or “You actually look nice today” can be meant to put you down under the guise of a compliment.
8. They’re overly interested in your personal problems.
When someone seems to thrive on hearing about your challenges or setbacks, it might be a red flag. They may act concerned, but if they’re more interested in hearing about the drama than offering real support, it could mean they’re secretly enjoying your struggles.
9. They’re inconsistent with how they treat you around other people.
Pay attention if someone is friendly when it’s just the two of you, but distant or dismissive in a group setting. This inconsistency can reveal their true feelings, especially if they’re more concerned about how they look to other people.
10. They keep offering unsolicited “advice.”
Advice is great when it’s coming from a genuine place, but if they’re constantly giving tips you didn’t ask for, it might not be as helpful as it seems. Some people offer unsolicited advice as a way to make you feel inferior or highlight your perceived shortcomings.
11. They share your personal information.
If they’re sharing things you’ve told them in confidence with other people, it’s a sign they don’t respect your privacy or trust. Friendly people respect boundaries, so if they’re spreading your secrets, it might mean they don’t have your best interests at heart.
12. They avoid direct eye contact when you’re talking.
People who aren’t sincere often struggle to look you in the eye when they’re being friendly or complimentary. Shifty or inconsistent eye contact can indicate that they’re uncomfortable or hiding something.
13. They downplay your accomplishments.
If they brush off or belittle things you’re proud of, it could mean they don’t actually support you. Comments like “Oh, that’s nice” or “I didn’t think it was that big of a deal” can signal that they’re not as happy for you as they claim to be.
14. They laugh at your expense in a “joking” way.
Someone who secretly dislikes you might make jokes that target your insecurities or weaknesses. If their humour feels like it’s hitting a bit too close to home, it could mean they’re using jokes to mask their real feelings.
15. They’re always in competition with you.
While friendly rivalry can be healthy, if someone turns everything into a competition, it might be a sign they’re trying to one-up you. Instead of celebrating your wins, they might be more focused on proving they’re “better” in some way.
