I’ll be honest, it’s hard to stay positive and optimistic in today’s world, which is why so many of us (myself included) often slip into a mindset of doom and gloom.
However, walking around with the equivalent of a huge storm cloud over your head every day isn’t going to change anything in your life (or the world) for the better, so it needs to stop. When that inner voice gets a little too focused on worst-case scenarios and everything that’s wrong, here’s how to tell it to be quiet.
1. Challenge your thoughts with cold, hard facts.
When that gloomy voice pipes up with a dire prediction, take a step back and examine the evidence. Are you really going to get sacked because you were five minutes late to work once? Probably not. Look for concrete facts that contradict your worries. Often, you’ll find that your fears are based more on emotion than reality.
2. Give your inner critic a ridiculous name.
It might sound silly, but naming that negative voice can help you separate it from your true self. Call it something absurd, like “Debbie Downer” or “Pessimistic Pete”. When those gloomy thoughts creep in, you can say, “Oh, that’s just Debbie being dramatic again.” It adds a bit of humour and helps you take those thoughts less seriously.
3. Set a worry time limit.
If you can’t seem to shake those negative thoughts, try scheduling a specific “worry time”. Set aside 15 minutes a day when you allow yourself to fret and stew. When worries pop up outside this time, jot them down for later. This technique helps contain your anxiety and prevents it from seeping into every moment of your day.
4. Practise mindfulness to stay in the present.
Source: Unsplash Often, that voice of doom is focused on future what-ifs or past regrets. Mindfulness brings you back to the present moment. Try focusing on your breath or the sensations in your body. Notice the colours, sounds, and smells around you. By grounding yourself in the here and now, you’re giving less airtime to those gloomy predictions.
5. Create a positivity playlist.
Source: Unsplash Music has a powerful effect on our mood. Curate a playlist of songs that make you feel upbeat and confident. When that inner voice starts its doom and gloom routine, pop on your headphones and let the music drown it out. Choose tunes with lyrics that counteract your negative thoughts for an extra boost.
6. Reframe negative thoughts into questions.
Instead of letting your inner voice make definitive negative statements, turn them into questions. Rather than “I’m going to mess up this presentation”, ask “How can I prepare to do my best in this presentation?” This simple shift moves you from a place of helplessness to problem-solving mode.
7. Start a “wins” journal.
Source: Unsplash That gloomy inner voice often ignores your successes and fixates on failures. Counter this by keeping a journal of your daily wins, no matter how small. Did you make your bed? Win. Finished a work project on time? Big win. Reviewing these regularly reminds you of your capabilities and challenges that pessimistic narrative.
8. Use the “friend test” on your thoughts.
When you’re caught in a spiral of negative self-talk, ask yourself: “Would I say these things to a friend?” Chances are, you wouldn’t. Try to extend the same kindness and understanding to yourself that you would to a loved one. This can help you recognise when your inner critic is being unreasonably harsh.
9. Engage in mood-boosting physical activities.
Physical activity is a great way to shift your mental state. When those gloomy thoughts start creeping in, get moving. It doesn’t have to be a full workout – a brisk walk, a quick dance party in your living room, or even some stretching can help. The endorphins released during exercise can help quieten that pessimistic voice.
10. Practise gratitude regularly.
It’s hard for doom and gloom to coexist with genuine gratitude. Make it a habit to note down three things you’re grateful for each day. They don’t have to be big – a decent latte, a text from a friend, or some nice weather all count. This practise helps retrain your brain to notice the positive aspects of your life.
11. Use visualisation techniques.
When your inner voice is painting a bleak picture, actively visualise a positive outcome instead. If you’re worried about a job interview, imagine yourself confidently answering questions and making a great impression. This doesn’t guarantee success, but it can help reduce anxiety and boost your confidence.
12. Limit your exposure to negative media.
If your gloomy thoughts increase after watching the news or scrolling through social media, it might be time for a digital detox. Set boundaries around your media consumption. Choose specific times to check the news rather than having a constant stream of potentially anxiety-inducing information.
13. Create a “worry vs. control” list.
Source: Unsplash When your mind is swirling with concerns, grab a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle. On one side, list your worries. On the other, write down what aspects of each situation you can control. Focus your energy on the things you can influence, and try to let go of the rest.
14. Use positive affirmations.
Counter that negative inner monologue with positive affirmations. Choose statements that directly challenge your common worries. If you often think “I’m not good enough”, try repeating “I am capable and worthy” each morning. It might feel awkward at first, but with consistency, it can help reshape your thought patterns.
15. Engage in acts of kindness.
When you’re stuck in a cycle of gloomy thoughts, shift your focus outward. Do something kind for someone else – call a friend who’s going through a tough time, volunteer, or even just smile at a stranger. These acts not only benefit others but can also boost your own mood and provide a welcome distraction from internal negativity.
