You know that weird feeling where everything’s going swimmingly, but you’re still waiting for the other shoe to drop?
It’s like your brain’s got trust issues with happiness. You’re finally chilled out, but somehow that’s making you more stressed. Sounds crazy, right? Here’s why being calm might be doing your head in.
1. You’re convinced you’ve forgotten something important.
There you are, feet up, brew in hand, feeling incredibly relaxed. But then it hits you — surely you’ve forgotten something? You rack your brain trying to remember what it is you’re meant to be stressing about. It’s like your mind can’t accept that everything’s actually alright for once. Before you know it, you’re making a mental list of all the things you might’ve forgotten, working yourself up into a state.
2. You’re waiting for the universe to balance things out.
Life’s been going smoothly lately, and that’s exactly what’s got you on edge. You’re half expecting a piano to fall on your head or your car to break down, just to even things out. It’s like you’re living in fear of some cosmic scorekeeper who’s about to say, “Right, you’ve had your fun, time for some misery.”
3. You feel guilty for not being productive.
You’ve finally got a moment to yourself, no pressing deadlines or urgent tasks. But instead of enjoying it, you’re feeling guilty. Shouldn’t you be doing something? Cleaning the house? Starting that project you’ve been putting off? Your mind starts racing with all the things you could be doing, and before you know it, your peaceful moment has turned into a stress-fest about your lack of productivity.
4. You’re not used to feeling calm, so it feels wrong.
If you’re someone who’s always on the go, always juggling a million things, feeling calm can actually be pretty unsettling. It’s like your brain doesn’t know what to do with itself when it’s not in crisis mode. The calm feels alien, almost wrong, and that in itself can trigger anxiety. You start wondering if you’ve missed something or if you’re in denial about some looming disaster.
5. You’re worried about losing control.
Source: Unsplash For some people, being anxious or stressed feels like a way of staying in control. When you’re calm, you might feel like you’re letting your guard down. What if something goes wrong, and you’re not prepared? This fear of losing control can turn your moment of relaxation into a spiral of what-ifs and worst-case scenarios.
6. You’re overthinking why you’re feeling calm.
Source: Unsplash You notice you’re feeling calm, and instead of just enjoying it, you start analysing it. Why am I feeling calm? Is this normal? Should I be feeling this way? Before you know it, you’ve turned your calmness into a problem to be solved, and you’re right back to feeling anxious. It’s like your brain can’t just let a good thing be.
7. You’re worried about how long the calm will last.
Source: Unsplash The moment you realise you’re feeling calm, you start worrying about when it’s going to end. You’re so focused on the inevitable return of stress that you can’t enjoy the peace you’re feeling right now. It’s like you’re already mourning the loss of your calm before it’s even gone, which, ironically, disrupts your calm state.
8. You feel disconnected from your usual self.
Source: Unsplash If you’re used to being a bit of a stress-head, feeling calm might make you feel like you’re not yourself. It’s like you don’t recognise this chilled-out version of you. This disconnect from your usual stressed self can be unsettling, making you question if something’s wrong with you for not worrying as much as usual.
9. You’re superstitious about acknowledging good feelings.
Source: Unsplash Some of us have this weird idea that if we acknowledge when things are good, we’ll jinx it. So when you realise you’re feeling calm, you immediately try to push that feeling away or downplay it. You might even start looking for things to worry about, just to ward off any potential bad luck that might come from admitting you’re feeling good.
10. You’re worried about letting people down.
Source: Unsplash If you’re the person everyone relies on to get stuff done, feeling calm might make you worry that you’re letting people down. Shouldn’t you be rushing around, sorting out everyone’s problems? This pressure to always be the responsible, stressed-out one can turn your moment of calm into anxiety about not meeting others’ expectations.
11. You feel like you don’t deserve to be calm.
Source: Unsplash Sometimes, we get it into our heads that we don’t deserve to feel good. Maybe you think you haven’t worked hard enough, or you’re not a good enough person to merit feeling calm. This twisted logic can turn your peaceful moment into a guilt trip, making you anxious about enjoying a bit of tranquillity.
12. You’re afraid of missing out on something.
Source: Unsplash In our constantly connected world, feeling calm might trigger a fear that you’re missing out on something. While you’re sitting there peacefully, are your mates having fun without you? Is there breaking news you should know about? This FOMO can quickly turn your calm into anxiety about all the things you might be missing.
13. You’re not sure how to act when you’re calm.
Source: Unsplash If you’re used to always being on edge, you might not know how to behave when you’re actually feeling calm. Should you be doing something different? Is this how normal people feel all the time? Your uncertainty about how to be in your calm state can paradoxically make you feel anxious.
14. You’re worried about becoming complacent.
Source: Unsplash There’s a part of you that believes your anxiety keeps you sharp and on your toes, so when you’re feeling calm, you might worry that you’re becoming complacent. What if you miss something important because you’re too relaxed? Your fear of letting your guard down can quickly turn your calm into anxiety about not being vigilant enough.
15. You’re anticipating the comedown.
Source: Unsplash Sometimes, the calm before the storm is actually worse than the storm itself. You’re feeling good now, but you’re dreading how you’ll feel when this peaceful feeling ends. Will the contrast make your regular stress feel even worse? Your anticipation of the comedown can cast a shadow over your current calmness, bringing on anxiety even while you’re meant to be relaxed.
