Neurodivergent people—whether they’re autistic, ADHD, or have other neurodivergent traits—often communicate in ways that might come across as blunt or rude.
However, this isn’t intentional — they’re usually just being honest because they don’t see the point in beating around the bush. Many of these “rude” comments come from a place of sincerity, not malice. Here are just a few of the things neurodivergent people say that might rub people the wrong way. Try not to take it to heart too much if you hear them!
1. “I don’t understand why you’re upset.”
When a neurodivergent person says this, they’re not dismissing your feelings—they genuinely don’t understand what’s wrong. Neurodivergent people often process emotions differently, and subtle cues can be hard to pick up on. They want to understand, but they might need it spelled out clearly.
2. “That’s not funny.”
Humour can be subjective, and neurodivergent people may not pick up on sarcasm or jokes the same way other people do. When they say, “That’s not funny,” they’re usually just expressing how they feel, not trying to ruin the mood. Their honesty might be blunt, but it’s rarely intended to offend.
3. “You already told me that.”
This isn’t meant to be dismissive or sassy. Many neurodivergent people rely on clear, efficient communication and might not see the need for repetition. When they point out that you’ve repeated yourself, they’re simply stating a fact, not criticising your storytelling skills.
4. “I don’t want to do that.”
Directness can sometimes be mistaken for rudeness. When a neurodivergent person says this, they’re not trying to be difficult—they’re just being honest about their boundaries or preferences. They value clarity over polite ambiguity, which can sometimes be refreshing if you think about it!
5. “Why are you doing it that way?”
They’re not necessarily judging you; they might genuinely be curious or confused about your approach. Neurodivergent minds often focus on logic, efficiency, or patterns. When they ask this question, they might be looking for an explanation, not trying to criticise your methods.
6. “I don’t care.”
This can sound harsh, but it’s often just a straightforward way of saying, “I have no strong feelings about this.” They’re not trying to be dismissive—they’re expressing neutrality. Sometimes, they might be overwhelmed or trying to avoid making a decision they don’t have the energy for.
7. “That doesn’t make sense.”
To a neurodivergent person, logical inconsistencies or unclear explanations stand out like neon signs. When they say this, they’re not questioning your intelligence—they’re genuinely struggling to understand. They value clarity and might need you to explain things in a different way.
8. “I need you to stop talking.”
Overstimulation is real, and when someone talks for too long, it can become overwhelming. When a neurodivergent person says this, it’s often because they’re reaching their sensory or cognitive limit. It’s not an attack on you; they just need a mental break.
9. “That’s wrong.”
Blunt honesty is a hallmark of many neurodivergent communication styles. If something is factually incorrect, they might point it out directly. They’re not trying to embarrass or argue—they simply value accuracy and truth. It’s not personal; it’s just how they communicate.
10. “I don’t see the point.”
Small talk, traditions, or certain tasks might seem pointless to a neurodivergent person. When they say this, they’re not trying to be rude—they just need to understand the reason behind what they’re doing. Explaining the purpose can help them engage more fully.
11. “Can you just get to the point?”
Some neurodivergent people prefer concise, direct communication. Long-winded explanations or stories can feel overwhelming or confusing. This comment isn’t meant to rush you or dismiss your thoughts—they just process information more efficiently when it’s straightforward.
12. “I’m bored.”
When a neurodivergent person says this, they’re not trying to insult you or the situation. They’re simply stating how they feel in the moment. For some, boredom can be incredibly uncomfortable or even distressing. It’s not personal—they might just need more stimulation.
13. “That outfit looks weird.”
Honesty is their default setting. When they make comments about appearance, they’re usually just expressing their opinion, not trying to hurt feelings. They might not understand the social expectation of sugarcoating feedback, but their intention isn’t malicious.
14. “I don’t remember you.”
Faces, names, and social details can be hard to keep track of for some neurodivergent people. When they say this, they’re not trying to be cold or rude—they genuinely struggle with recall. It’s nothing personal; their brains might just work differently when it comes to memory.
15. “This is boring.”
They’re not trying to offend you—they’re expressing their experience honestly. For some neurodivergent people, sitting through something uninteresting can be excruciating. Instead of pretending, they’ll just tell it like it is. It’s not a reflection on you; it’s about their need for engagement.
16. “I don’t care about that topic.”
When they say this, they’re not trying to be dismissive—they’re simply being honest about their interests. For some neurodivergent people, feigning interest in a topic they don’t care about is exhausting. They’d rather have a conversation that genuinely engages them.
