Narcissists have a sick talent for twisting words in ways that manipulate the people on the receiving end.
They rarely say what they mean; everything has a hidden motive and usually doesn’t represent reality in any way. The words they use are inevitably geared towards making you doubt yourself and feel crazy, but the good thing is that once you know what you’re listening out for, they become painfully obvious. Here are some of the worst offenders — if you hear these from a narcissist’s mouth, your only response should be an eye roll.
1. “You’re overreacting.”
Source: Unsplash Whenever you express how you feel, they brush it off with this dismissive phrase. The goal is to make you doubt whether your feelings are valid. They want you to believe that your emotional response is the real problem, not their behaviour.
2. “I never said that.”
If you’re sure you heard them say something, but now they’re denying it, welcome to the narcissist’s favourite game: gaslighting. They’ll rewrite history in real-time, leaving you wondering if you’ve imagined the whole thing. It’s an intentional tactic to undermine your confidence in your memory and perception.
3. “You’re just being dramatic.”
They love labelling you as “dramatic” whenever you try to address a genuine concern. It’s their way of avoiding accountability and making you feel like the problem is you, not their behaviour. This shifts the focus away from them and onto your emotions, making you second-guess your reaction.
4. “No one else has ever had a problem with me.”
This phrase is designed to isolate you and make you question whether you’re the unreasonable one. In reality, it’s just another manipulation tactic to avoid taking responsibility for their actions. They know how to twist the narrative to make themselves look blameless while casting doubt on your experiences.
5. “You’re imagining things.”
When you notice something’s off, they’ll hit you with this classic line to make you doubt your instincts. Narcissists thrive on making you question your perception of reality—it keeps you off balance. By planting seeds of uncertainty, they maintain control over the situation and your responses.
6. “You’re too sensitive.”
Expressing hurt or frustration? They’ll weaponise your feelings by calling you overly sensitive. It’s their way of minimising your emotions while shifting the blame onto you for even having them. They rely on this line to invalidate your perspective and silence future concerns.
7. “I was just joking. Can’t you take a joke?”
When their “joke” crosses a line, they’ll deflect by acting like you’re humourless. They use this to dodge accountability and make you question whether you’re the one being unreasonable about their hurtful comments. This tactic keeps you guessing about their true intentions and second-guessing your reaction.
8. “Nobody will ever love you like I do.”
This one’s a favourite for keeping you hooked. It’s designed to make you feel dependent and afraid of leaving. They want you to believe that their love, no matter how flawed, is the best you’ll ever have, keeping you tied to the relationship longer than you should be.
9. “You’re so ungrateful.”
If you call out their behaviour, they’ll twist it to make it seem like you don’t appreciate all they’ve “done” for you. It’s a guilt trip disguised as a moral lecture, and it’s all about control. They’ll often exaggerate their contributions to make you feel indebted, even when it’s not warranted.
10. “You made me do it.”
Whatever they’ve done wrong, it’s suddenly your fault. Whether it’s losing their temper or making a bad decision, they’ll blame you for “pushing” them into it. This line deflects blame and subtly suggests that you’re the one who needs to change, not them.
11. “Everyone agrees with me.”
Even if no one has actually voiced support for their perspective, they’ll claim that “everyone” is on their side. It’s their way of ganging up on you with imaginary allies, leaving you feeling outnumbered and isolated. By creating this false consensus, they aim to make you doubt your own judgment further.
12. “I’m only saying this because I care.”
Under the guise of “caring,” they’ll deliver cutting remarks about your appearance, choices, or personality. It’s a clever tactic to make their criticisms seem well-intentioned while still undermining your confidence. This phrase is often followed by unsolicited advice meant to control or belittle you further.
13. “You’re impossible to talk to.”
If you try to address an issue, they’ll shut down the conversation by blaming you for being “difficult.” It’s their way of escaping any meaningful discussion without addressing their behaviour. They thrive on making you feel like the problem so that they can avoid facing their own flaws.
14. “You’ll never survive without me.”
To keep you feeling dependent, they’ll plant seeds of doubt about your ability to thrive on your own. This line is all about control—don’t fall for it. They rely on undermining your confidence so that you feel stuck and unable to leave the relationship.
15. “You’re lucky I put up with you.”
They frame their presence in your life as some sort of charitable act, making you feel like you’re the one who’s difficult to deal with. In reality, healthy relationships don’t involve “putting up” with each other—they involve mutual respect and care. This phrase is more about inflating their ego than reflecting the truth.
16. “You’ll never find someone better.”
This line is designed to shatter your self-esteem and keep you from leaving. The truth is, if someone has to convince you that they’re your best option, they’re probably not. People who genuinely care for you won’t need to belittle your worth to keep you close.
