It’s the oldest gaslighting trick in the book: you have a totally reasonable reaction to something, and instead of being validated, you’re brushed off with an accusation of being “too sensitive.”
First of all, being sensitive isn’t a bad thing. You’re a human being with feelings, and the fact that you feel connected enough with yourself to recognise and express them is actually a sign of emotional intelligence. Second, this is just a way for the person saying it to get out of taking accountability for their actions and owning up to their own bad behaviour. The next time someone throws this rubbish your way, here are some possible responses you can hit back with — see which one suits you best.
1. “Why do you think that’s a bad thing?”
This is a great way to turn the conversation around. Asking why they think being sensitive is bad gets them thinking about what they’re actually saying. It challenges the assumption that sensitivity is automatically negative. You can subtly shift the conversation from being about you to being about them. It also gives you the opportunity to point out the positive side of sensitivity — like how it shows empathy, understanding, and the ability to connect with people.
2. “I prefer to care about things deeply.”
This one works well when you want to frame your sensitivity as something that shows you actually care. It suggests that you’re emotionally invested in what matters to you, which is not a weakness at all. Instead of framing it as an overreaction, you’re saying you value feeling deeply about the things that matter in life. It’s a gentle way of standing up for yourself, showing pride in your emotional side, and challenging the other person’s perspective without being confrontational.
3. “I think it’s okay to feel things strongly.”
Sometimes, a simple response is the best one. By saying this, you show that you’re totally okay with your feelings and that you don’t see them as something to be ashamed of. You’re owning your emotions and setting a boundary in the process. It’s a quiet but strong reminder that feeling deeply isn’t something that needs to be suppressed or apologised for — it’s just a part of being human.
4. “That’s one way to see it, but I see it differently.”
If you want to keep the conversation from getting heated but still assert your position, this is a solid response. You acknowledge their point of view without agreeing with it, and then gently offer your own perspective. It’s a great way to assert that your feelings are valid while still leaving space for a respectful exchange of views. It’s also a clever way of saying, “I don’t need your approval to feel the way I do.” That’s true, as well — you really don’t!
5. “It’s because I value meaningful connections.”
This links your sensitivity to something positive: your ability to form deep, meaningful connections with people. By moving the focus away from your emotional reaction and onto your priorities, you show that your feelings come from a place of valuing relationships and authenticity. It helps make the conversation less about what’s “wrong” with being sensitive and more about what’s right with having emotional depth.
6. “Do you think being sensitive is a bad thing?”
Asking this puts the responsibility back on them to explain why they think sensitivity is a problem. Sometimes, people dismiss sensitivity because they’re uncomfortable with their own emotions, not because there’s anything wrong with yours. It also happens to be a question that encourages them to reflect on their own beliefs, and it can even lead to a more productive conversation about emotions in general. It helps them see that their discomfort with your sensitivity might say more about them than it does about you.
7. “I feel deeply because I care deeply.”
Your capacity to care and show compassion are wonderful traits to have, and this one points out the pride you feel about that. It’s also a great way of framing your emotions as a strength, not a weakness. It’s also a reminder that your feelings come from a place of authenticity and that caring about things deeply is something to be valued. It’s a great response if you want to subtly remind the other person that emotional expression is a sign of strength, not fragility.
8. “I’d rather be sensitive than indifferent.”
Here’s where you can really stand your ground. This response challenges the idea that being sensitive is something to apologise for. You’re saying that you’d much rather feel and care deeply than shut off or be indifferent. It puts indifference in the spotlight as the less desirable alternative, making it clear that you’re proud of your emotional depth and that it’s something you wouldn’t trade for a more detached or ‘cool’ persona. It’s bold, but it shows you’re confident in your emotional side.
9. “Everyone experiences emotions differently.”
This is a great way to normalise your sensitivity while also gently pointing out that not everyone processes emotions the same way. It reminds the other person that emotions aren’t one-size-fits-all. Just because they might not experience things the way you do doesn’t make your feelings any less valid. It’s a way of shifting the focus from your sensitivity to a broader understanding of how emotions work for everyone.
10. “I don’t see sensitivity as a flaw.”
Straight to the point, this one directly challenges the negative connotation behind their comment. You’re making it clear that you don’t agree with their assessment of your sensitivity. It’s assertive but not aggressive; it simply states your truth and sets a boundary without escalating things. It’s a powerful way of saying that you’re not apologising for who you are, and you don’t see your emotions as something to be fixed.
11. “Why do you feel the need to say that?”
This one puts the focus back on them, which is really where it should be anyway. Instead of defending yourself, you’re asking them to explain their words. It also invites them to reflect on their own behaviour and can make them realise that their comment was unnecessary or even hurtful. By calmly questioning their need to make such a remark, you take control of the situation without getting defensive, which can lead to a much more productive conversation.
12. “I think sensitivity shows strength, not weakness.”
You get to reclaim your sensitivity with this powerful response. By turning sensitivity into something that shows resilience and courage, you flip the script entirely. You’re not just defending your emotions, you’re framing them as a sign of strength. It’s also a great way to shut down the idea that being sensitive means being weak, and it encourages the other person to reconsider their perception of emotional expression.
13. “That’s just part of who I am.”
This is a simple but effective response that puts the conversation to rest. You’re calmly saying that your sensitivity is just a part of who you are, and you’re not interested in changing it. It’s a quiet declaration of self-acceptance, and it sends the message that their opinion isn’t going to make you doubt yourself. By framing your sensitivity as just another part of your identity, you set a clear boundary and let them know that you’re not ashamed of it.
14. “I don’t mind being sensitive if it means I stay true to myself.”
This one takes things up a notch. You’re making it clear that your sensitivity is a core part of who you are, and you wouldn’t change it just to make someone else more comfortable. It’s a confident way of standing up for your emotional side while reinforcing the importance of authenticity. It also invites the other person to reflect on their own priorities—whether they value emotional depth or prefer to keep things superficial.
15. “I think it’s better to feel than to shut down.”
This is a solid reminder that being sensitive isn’t a flaw—it’s a healthier way to engage with the world. You’re shifting the conversation from a negative view of sensitivity to a positive one, framing it as something that keeps you connected to your emotions. It defends your feelings and encourages a broader perspective on emotional expression and why it matters.
16. “Thanks for noticing! I’m actually proud of being sensitive.”
Ending on a confident note, this response flips their criticism into something positive. By responding with pride, you show that you’re completely comfortable with your emotions and not at all apologetic for them. It’s a little playful but also assertive, and it sends a strong message that sensitivity is a part of who you are—and you’re fine with that.
