It’s not easy to be brave — that’s why courage is such a respected quality because not everyone has it, and it takes guts.
However, some people will always choose the path of least resistance, no matter how much it costs them or the people around them. So, how do you know if someone is truly spineless? The people who do these things certainly fit the bill!
1. They gossip behind people’s backs, but never address issues directly.
We’ve all been guilty of a bit of gossip now and then, but if someone’s constantly talking about others behind their backs without ever addressing issues face-to-face, it’s a bit cowardly. It’s easy to moan about someone when they’re not there, but it takes guts to have an honest conversation with the person involved.
2. They always go along with the crowd.
Everyone knows at least someone who never seems to have their own opinion on anything. They just nod along with whatever the group decides, even if it goes against their own interests. It’s one thing to be flexible, but never standing up for your own views or desires is a bit spineless. Having your own thoughts and being able to express them is part of being an adult, after all.
3. They avoid confrontation at all costs.
While nobody enjoys a row, sometimes you need to face issues head-on. If someone’s always ducking out of difficult conversations or pretending problems don’t exist, it’s a sign they might lack courage. Sweeping things under the rug only leads to bigger issues down the line. A bit of healthy confrontation can clear the air and solve problems before they grow.
4. They blame other people for their mistakes.
Owning up to your mistakes takes courage. If someone’s always pointing the finger at others when things go wrong, it’s a sign they might be a bit spineless. We all mess up sometimes — the brave thing to do is admit it, learn from it, and move on. Constantly passing the buck is just childish.
5. They’re afraid to say ‘no’ to people.
Being helpful is great, but if someone’s agreeing to every request or demand, even when it’s not in their best interest, it shows a lack of backbone. Learning to say ‘no’ when necessary is an important life skill. It’s about respecting your own time and boundaries, not just trying to please everyone else all the time.
6. They ghost people instead of being honest.
Given the popularity of online dating and social media, ghosting has become all too common. However, that doesn’t make it right. Disappearing without a word when things get tough or uncomfortable is pretty spineless. Whether it’s a romantic relationship or a friendship, having the courage to communicate openly, even if it’s to say goodbye, shows far more character.
7. They lie to avoid uncomfortable situations.
We’ve all told a white lie to get out of plans, but if someone’s constantly fibbing to avoid any kind of discomfort, it’s a bit cowardly. Being honest, even when it’s awkward or tough, is a sign of integrity. Habitual lying to escape uncomfortable situations just shows you’re not willing to face reality.
8. They never stand up for others.
It’s easy to keep your head down when you see someone else being treated unfairly. But if a person never speaks up for other people, even when they know something’s wrong, it shows a lack of courage. Standing up for what’s right, even when it’s not your fight, takes guts and shows true character.
9. They always play it safe and never take risks.
While there’s nothing wrong with being cautious, never taking any risks in life is a bit spineless. Growth often comes from stepping out of your comfort zone. If someone’s always choosing the safest option and never challenging themselves, they might be missing out on a lot of opportunities due to fear.
10. They refuse to make decisions.
We all struggle with decisions sometimes, but if someone’s constantly pushing the responsibility onto others, it’s a sign of spinelessness. Always responding with “I don’t mind, you choose” might seem easy-going, but it often means they’re afraid of making the wrong choice and facing the consequences.
11. They change their opinions based on who they’re talking to.
Having a chat with someone and realising they’ve completely changed their stance on something they were passionate about last week? If they’re constantly shifting their views to match whoever they’re talking to, it shows a lack of conviction. Having your own opinions and being able to stick to them, even when others disagree, takes backbone.
12. They avoid responsibility at work.
In the workplace, it’s easy to spot someone who’s a bit spineless. They’re the ones who never volunteer for projects, always pass difficult tasks to other people, and are nowhere to be found when something goes wrong. Taking on responsibilities and being accountable for your work takes courage, but it’s also how you grow in your career.
13. They let people walk all over them.
If someone’s constantly letting people take advantage of them without standing up for themselves, it’s a sign of spinelessness. Whether it’s friends, family, or colleagues, allowing people to consistently disrespect your time, feelings, or boundaries isn’t being nice — it’s being a doormat. Having the courage to assert yourself is necessary for self-respect.
14. They refuse to give honest feedback.
When asked for their opinion, a spineless person might always say what they think the other person wants to hear, rather than giving honest feedback. While it might seem kind in the moment, it’s actually doing a disservice. Having the courage to give constructive criticism when it’s asked for is a valuable skill.
15. They bail on plans at the last minute.
Source: Unsplash We all have to cancel plans sometimes, but if someone’s constantly backing out at the last minute, especially for flimsy reasons, it shows a lack of backbone. Sticking to your commitments, even when something more appealing comes up, is part of being reliable and respectful.
16. They refuse to apologise when they’re wrong.
Admitting you’re wrong and saying sorry takes guts. If someone’s always making excuses or deflecting blame rather than owning up to their mistakes and apologising, that’s a problem. A sincere apology shows strength of character, not weakness.
17. They avoid difficult conversations by communicating only through text.
Source: Unsplash It’s far too easy to hide behind screens, but if someone’s always resorting to texts or emails for important or sensitive conversations, it could be a sign they’re avoiding face-to-face interactions out of fear. While texting is convenient, having the courage to have difficult conversations in person or at least over the phone shows much more backbone.
