Most parents get their fair share of unsolicited advice, but that doesn’t make it okay.
While most of it is well-intentioned, people raising kids are doing their best and don’t need to hear “helpful” comments (read: masked criticism) from other people. In particular, those who only have one child don’t want to be grilled about their family structure. Here are things you should never say to parents of only children unless you want to come off as nosy, insensitive, and a little annoying.
1. “When are you having another one?”
Not every family wants, or can have, more than one child. Asking this question assumes they’re incomplete or haven’t thought through their decisions. It’s personal, unnecessary, and might touch on issues they’d rather not discuss.
2. “Aren’t you worried they’ll be spoiled?”
This stereotype about only children has been disproven time and again, but it still lingers. Suggesting their child is destined to be spoiled dismisses the parenting effort they’re already putting in. Raising a thoughtful, kind child has nothing to do with the number of siblings.
3. “They must be so lonely.”
Being an only child doesn’t automatically mean living in isolation. Many only children have rich social lives filled with friends, cousins, and activities. Comments like this ignore the fact that quality of relationships often matters more than quantity.
4. “Won’t they grow up selfish?”
This one stings because it assumes only children are inherently flawed. Teaching empathy, sharing, and kindness is part of parenting, regardless of sibling count. A child’s personality isn’t determined by their family size alone.
5. “It must be so easy with just one.”
Parenting is never “easy,” no matter how many children are in the family. Only children come with their own unique challenges, and dismissing those struggles minimises the hard work parents put in every day.
6. “Don’t you feel guilty?”
This question assumes they’re depriving their child of something essential, which is both unfair and untrue. Parents of only children often make their choices with love, care, and thoughtfulness, not guilt. Comments like this only create unnecessary pressure.
7. “What if something happens to your child?”
This is not only hurtful but also deeply insensitive. No parent wants to imagine such scenarios, and having multiple children isn’t a guarantee against loss. Bringing this up serves no purpose other than causing unnecessary worry.
8. “Who will they play with?”
Only children don’t lack playmates—they just find them in other ways. From friends to family members, many only children build strong social networks. Suggesting they’re lonely overlooks the creativity and adaptability kids naturally have.
9. “Don’t you want them to have a sibling?”
Some parents genuinely don’t feel the need for more children, and that’s okay. This comment assumes their family is incomplete without siblings, which might not reflect their values or priorities. Every family dynamic is valid.
10. “Your house must be so quiet.”
This statement might seem harmless, but it can come across as judgmental. The truth is, households with one child can be just as lively and full of love as larger families. Noise level doesn’t determine the joy of a home.
11. “Aren’t you worried about their social skills?”
Social skills aren’t exclusive to children with siblings. Only children develop their social abilities in school, activities, and through friendships. Assuming they’ll lack these skills overlooks the many ways kids learn to navigate the world.
12. “They’re so lucky to get everything.”
Source: Unsplash This assumes only children are spoiled with material things, which may not be true at all. Parents of only children often focus on giving their child experiences and opportunities, not just “stuff.” It’s a narrow view of what makes a happy family.
13. “Don’t you think they’ll be too dependent on you?”
Only children can be incredibly independent, often learning to solve problems and entertain themselves at an early age. Assuming they’ll grow up overly reliant on their parents is another outdated stereotype that doesn’t reflect reality.
14. “Aren’t you worried they’ll grow up entitled?”
Entitlement isn’t a byproduct of family size—it’s shaped by parenting choices. Parents of only children are just as capable of teaching humility and gratitude as those with larger families. Comments like this imply a lack of trust in their parenting.
15. “They’ll have no one to lean on when you’re gone.”
While this sentiment might come from a place of concern, it’s unnecessarily grim. Many only children form close bonds with extended family and friends who can provide support throughout life. Family isn’t just about siblings—it’s about the relationships you nurture.
16. “Don’t you get bored with just one?”
Parents of only children pour their time and energy into raising one child, which is as fulfilling and busy as raising multiple. This comment undermines the effort they’re putting into their parenting journey, regardless of how many kids they have.
17. “Wouldn’t life be better with more kids?”
Source: Unsplash This question assumes that more children equal more happiness, which isn’t the case for every family. Parents of only children often find joy in their unique dynamic and don’t feel the need to expand their family to feel fulfilled. Every family has its own definition of happiness.
