If you’ve ever wanted the ground to swallow you up in embarrassment as your partner committed yet another faux pas, that’s a red flag.
While nobody’s perfect, some behaviours are just far too awkward for words. If you’ve ever found yourself making excuses for your other half’s uncomfortable antics, your partner’s social skills may be lacking. Here are some signs that’s the case.
1. They laugh at inappropriate moments during serious conversations.
Picture this: You’re at a funeral, and your partner suddenly bursts into giggles during the eulogy. It’s not because they found anything genuinely funny; they just couldn’t handle the emotional tension. Their nervous laughter isn’t just limited to sombre occasions — it pops up during work meetings, family arguments, or even when you’re trying to have a heart-to-heart. It’s as if their brain short-circuits and decides that awkward laughter is the best option. Spoiler alert: it’s not.
2. Their idea of small talk involves oversharing personal details.
Most people ease into conversations with comments about the weather or asking how someone’s day is going. Not your partner. They dive head first into the deep end, regaling unsuspecting listeners with tales of their recent colonoscopy or the intimate details of your last argument. Before you know it, the cashier at Tesco knows more about your relationship than your best mate. Yikes.
3. They constantly interrupt people mid-sentence.
Source: Unsplash Listening seems to be a foreign concept to your partner. They often cut people off mid-sentence, eager to share their own thoughts or experiences. It’s as if they believe conversations are a competitive sport, and the goal is to get in as many words as possible. You’ve lost count of the number of times you’ve had to apologise to friends, family, or colleagues for your partner’s verbal steamrolling.
4. They mistake sarcasm for literal statements.
Sarcasm flies over your partner’s head like a jumbo jet. When someone says, “Oh great, more rain, just what we needed,” your partner cheerfully agrees, completely missing the irony. Their literal interpretation of everything leads to countless misunderstandings and awkward situations. You’ve given up on using witty banter or playful teasing in your relationship because it inevitably ends with your partner looking confused or, worse, offended. It’s like living with Drax from Guardians of the Galaxy, minus the cool alien backstory.
5. They have no concept of personal space.
Source: Unsplash Your partner seems to think that the appropriate distance for conversation is somewhere between “uncomfortably close” and “are we about to kiss?” They lean in when talking to people, stand too close in queues, and have an uncanny ability to make everyone around them take a step back. You’ve tried explaining the concept of personal bubbles, but they just don’t get it.
6. They dominate every conversation with monologues.
Source: Unsplash Once your partner starts talking, it’s like they’ve boarded a runaway train of thought with no stops planned. They ramble on about their interests, oblivious to the glazed-over eyes and fidgeting of their captive audience. You’ve developed a secret signal system with friends to rescue them from these verbal marathons, but even that doesn’t always work. At parties, you find yourself playing conversational lifeguard, ready to dive in and save drowning victims of your partner’s monologues.
7. They miss obvious social cues to wrap up a conversation.
Source: Unsplash While most people pick up on hints like checking watches, edging towards exits, or the classic “Well, I should get going,” your partner seems immune to these social cues. They continue chatting away, blissfully unaware that the other person is desperately trying to escape. You’ve resorted to physically pulling them away from conversations, muttering excuses about appointments you’re late for.
8. They ask invasive questions without realising it’s inappropriate.
Source: Unsplash Your partner has an uncanny ability to ask the most uncomfortable questions at the worst possible times. “So, when are you two planning on having kids?” they’ll cheerfully ask a couple who’ve been dating for two weeks. Or they’ll inquire about someone’s salary within minutes of meeting them. It’s as if they have a radar for sensitive topics and feel compelled to bring them up. You’ve considered creating a list of taboo questions, but you’re afraid they’d use it as a conversation starter.
9. They take jokes literally and try to explain why they’re incorrect.
Humour is wasted on your partner. When someone cracks a joke, instead of laughing, they furrow their brow and start explaining why the premise is factually incorrect. “Actually, chickens don’t have the cognitive ability to make decisions about road crossing,” they’ll say, completely missing the point.
10. They use outdated or offensive slang in an attempt to sound cool.
In a misguided attempt to fit in, your partner peppers their speech with slang that was cool about two decades ago. They’ll confidently declare things as “groovy” or “da bomb,” leaving everyone around them cringing. Worse still, they sometimes use terms they don’t understand, leading to accidentally offensive statements.
11. They have no filter between their thoughts and speech.
Your partner’s mind-to-mouth pipeline has no quality control. Whatever thought pops into their head immediately comes out of their mouth, regardless of appropriateness or context. This leads to gems like commenting on someone’s weight gain at a wedding or pointing out a bad toupee in a business meeting.
12. They mistake polite laughter for genuine amusement.
When people give a polite chuckle at your partner’s attempts at humour, they take it as encouragement to continue. This results in them repeating the same unfunny joke multiple times, each rendition more painful than the last. You’ve tried to explain the concept of courtesy laughs, but they remain convinced that they’re the next big stand-up comedian.
13. They give unsolicited advice to strangers.
Your partner fancies themselves an expert on everything and feels compelled to share their wisdom with the world. This means offering dieting tips to people in the supermarket queue, parenting advice to harried mothers in the park, or financial guidance to the barista making their coffee. You’ve lost count of the number of times you’ve had to apologise for their well-intentioned but unwelcome interventions. It’s like being partnered with a walking, talking self-help book that nobody asked for.
14. They mistake friendly customer service for genuine interest.
The cheerful “How are you today?” from shop assistants or waitstaff is interpreted by your partner as an invitation to start a deep, meaningful conversation. They’ll launch into detailed accounts of their day, health issues, or life story, oblivious to the growing queue behind them or the forced smile of the employee. You’ve started doing all the shopping alone just to avoid these awkward encounters.
15. They have an inability to read the room.
Your partner seems to exist in their own little bubble, completely oblivious to the atmosphere around them. They’ll crack jokes at serious meetings, bring up contentious political topics at family dinners, or start a heated debate at a relaxed social gathering.
16. They monopolise group photos with awkward poses.
Source: Unsplash+ Every group photo turns into a solo show starring your partner. While everyone else is smiling normally, they’re pulling faces, doing bunny ears, or striking dramatic poses that belong more in a cheesy ’80s music video than a family portrait. You’ve started warning photographers in advance, but somehow your partner always manages to sneak in a last-second dab or peace sign.
17. They misunderstand dress codes and social expectations.
Your partner’s wardrobe choices often leave you wondering if they own a calendar or have any concept of social norms. They’ll show up to black-tie events in jeans and a t-shirt, wear a tuxedo to a casual barbecue, or don beachwear for a job interview. You’ve tried laying out appropriate outfits in advance, but somehow they still manage to leave the house looking like they got dressed in the dark.
18. They treat every disagreement as a debate to be won.
Source: Unsplash For your partner, casual conversations are battlegrounds and every opinion is a hill to die on. They’ll argue about the most trivial things, from the correct way to load a dishwasher to the true colour of a dress in a photo. What’s worse, they’ll drag unwilling bystanders into these debates, demanding that strangers take sides.
