We’ve all heard the phrase, “playing dumb.” But when it becomes a strategic tool in the dynamic of a relationship, it’s far from funny.
Weaponised incompetence isn’t just about forgetting to put the bins out or feigning confusion over how the washing machine works. It’s a subtle tactic that can leave one partner feeling overwhelmed and underappreciated. So, let’s shine a light on this behaviour, shall we? Here are 10 ways men can use “weaponised incompetence” to make their wives’ lives just that little bit harder.
1. The eternal laundry novice
He’s never quite grasped the concept of lights vs darks, or even how to operate the washing machine, despite numerous demonstrations. Every time he attempts laundry, it results in a pile of pink socks or shrunken jumpers. This leaves you with the double burden of rewashing everything and a growing resentment towards those “accidentally” ruined garments.
2. The culinary incompetent
Source: Unsplash He burns toast, undercooks chicken, and can’t tell the difference between a frying pan and a saucepan. Every meal he prepares is a potential disaster. So, you end up either taking over the cooking duties entirely or fixing his culinary mishaps, adding another layer to your already overflowing plate.
3. The DIY disaster
Source: Pexels Whether it’s a leaky tap or a wonky shelf, he always seems to make things worse. Every DIY project turns into a costly call to a professional. This leaves you frustrated with the mess and additional expense, while he shrugs it off as “just one of those things.”
4. The eternal child
He needs constant reminders for even the simplest tasks, like brushing his teeth or taking out the rubbish. It’s like having another child to look after, rather than a partner. This infantilisation leaves you feeling exhausted and unappreciated, as you pick up the slack for his lack of responsibility.
5. The lost and confused navigator
Despite having GPS on his phone, he always seems to get lost, whether it’s on the way to the supermarket or a family outing. You end up being the designated navigator, your stress levels rising with each missed turn and wrong direction.
6. The emotionally unavailable partner
Whenever you try to talk about your feelings or any issues in the relationship, he clams up or changes the subject. He feigns confusion over your emotions, dismissing your concerns as “overreacting.” This emotional unavailability leaves you feeling unheard and unsupported.
7. The chronic procrastinator
He promises to do things, but they never seem to get done. It’s always “later” or “tomorrow” when it comes to household chores or important tasks. His procrastination leaves you feeling resentful as you end up completing these tasks yourself, adding to your already heavy workload.
8. The master of misdirection
Whenever you try to confront him about his behaviour, he twists your words, turns it around on you, or plays the victim. His ability to deflect blame leaves you feeling gaslighted and unsure of yourself.
9. The selective listener
He hears what he wants to hear, conveniently forgetting important dates, appointments, or conversations. His selective hearing leads to missed birthdays, double bookings, and repeated arguments, further straining your relationship.
10. The forgetful finance manager
Source: Unsplash He consistently forgets to pay bills, file important documents, or even check the post. His financial forgetfulness leads to late fees, missed deadlines, and unnecessary stress, leaving you to pick up the pieces and manage the household finances.
11. The technological terror
He struggles with even the most basic technology, like sending an email or setting an alarm. He constantly needs your assistance, turning simple tasks into frustrating tech support sessions. This technological ineptitude leaves you feeling like you’re his personal IT department, rather than his partner.
12. The absent-minded gift-giver
He forgets anniversaries, birthdays, and special occasions. Even when reminded, his gifts are often thoughtless or generic. This lack of effort leaves you feeling unappreciated and unimportant, wondering if he truly cares about your relationship.
13. The uncommunicative partner
He rarely initiates conversation or shares his thoughts and feelings. He responds to your questions with monosyllabic answers, leaving you to guess what’s going on in his head. This lack of communication leaves you feeling disconnected and lonely.
14. The unreliable childcare provider
When it comes to looking after the children, he often forgets important details like pick-up times or school events. He misplaces permission slips, forgets to pack lunches, and struggles to keep track of their schedules. This unreliability leaves you feeling stressed and overwhelmed, as you try to compensate for his forgetfulness.
