Sadly, not everyone you come across in life is going to be pleasant to deal with.
Whether it’s a toxic coworker, an overly dramatic friend, or a family member with no filter, some personalities can really test your patience. Obviously, you can’t change people — they are who they are — but you can change how you respond to them so that they’re a little less frustrating and your sanity remains (relatively) intact.
1. Understand and accept that their behaviour isn’t about you.
First things first: their personality issues aren’t your fault. If they’re rude, overly critical, or just plain difficult, it’s likely a reflection of their own insecurities or experiences. Remind yourself not to take their behaviour personally—it’s about them, not you. Keeping this in mind helps you maintain your own peace.
2. Set clear boundaries.
When dealing with someone difficult, boundaries are your best friend. Decide what behaviour you will and won’t tolerate, and stick to those limits. For instance, if they constantly interrupt, politely but firmly let them know it’s not okay. Clear boundaries make it easier to protect your emotional well-being.
3. Don’t engage in their drama.
People with difficult personalities often thrive on stirring up conflict or dragging others into their chaos. Resist the urge to get involved in their drama, even if it’s tempting to defend yourself. Staying neutral and calm keeps you from being sucked into their emotional whirlwind.
4. Practice the art of selective hearing.
Not everything they say needs your attention or response. Learn to tune out the unnecessary negativity and focus only on what’s important. This skill can save you a lot of unnecessary stress and help you stay grounded in conversations.
5. Find the funny side of the situation.
Sometimes, the best way to cope with a terrible personality is to laugh about it. Obviously, don’t laugh at them, but try to find the humour in their over-the-top behaviour. A little levity can help you deal with the frustration with less emotional strain.
6. Limit your time with them.
If possible, reduce how often you interact with this person. Whether it’s cutting down visits or shortening conversations, creating some distance can do wonders for your sanity. Use that extra time to focus on the people and activities that bring you joy.
7. Stay calm when they try to provoke you.
People with bad personalities often get a kick out of pushing your buttons. Don’t give them the satisfaction of a reaction. Stay calm, take a deep breath, and respond in a way that doesn’t escalate the situation. Your composure can throw them off balance.
8. Be kind but firm.
Kindness doesn’t mean being a pushover. You can treat them respectfully while still standing your ground. This approach helps you maintain control of the interaction without sinking to their level. Plus, it shows that you value yourself enough to hold your own.
9. Don’t expect them to change.
As much as you might want them to, people with bad personalities aren’t likely to wake up one day and suddenly become delightful. Accepting this reality can save you a lot of frustration. Focus on managing your expectations instead of hoping for a miraculous transformation.
10. Keep conversations brief and purposeful.
Long, meandering chats are fertile ground for negativity to take root. Keep interactions short and stick to the point. This way, they don’t get many opportunities to derail the conversation or bring unnecessary drama into the mix.
11. Surround yourself with supportive people.
Dealing with someone difficult is much easier when you have a strong support system. Spend time with friends or family who uplift and encourage you. Their positivity can counterbalance the negativity you experience from the person in question.
12. Focus on their redeeming qualities.
Even people with terrible personalities have some redeeming traits. Whether it’s their sense of humour or their ability to get things done, finding something positive about them can make dealing with them a little easier. Obviously, that doesn’t excuse all of their bad qualities, but it might make them a little easier to deal with.
13. Don’t internalise their criticism.
If they’re the type to throw jabs or make snide remarks, remember that their words say more about them than they do about you. Let their criticism roll off your back instead of letting it sink in. Confidence in yourself is your best defence.
14. Prepare for conversations and interactions ahead of time.
When you know you’ll be dealing with them, mentally rehearse how you’ll respond to their usual antics. Having a game plan helps you stay in control and reduces the chances of being caught off guard. When you’re prepared, you’re less likely to be as affected by their nonsense.
15. Find healthy ways to decompress afterward.
Dealing with a difficult person is, well, difficult, so make time for things that help you recharge. Whether it’s going for a run, journaling, or venting to a friend, finding an outlet for your emotions is a must. Taking care of yourself ensures their behaviour doesn’t weigh you down.
16. Know when to walk away.
Sometimes, the best way to deal with someone is to step back entirely. If the relationship becomes too toxic or draining, it’s okay to distance yourself or even cut ties if necessary. Protecting your peace should always be a priority.
17. Remind yourself it’s not forever.
Whether it’s a coworker you’ll eventually move on from or a situation that’s temporary, knowing it’s not permanent can help you cope. Focus on the bigger picture and remind yourself that this is just one part of your journey, not the whole story.
