It’s sucks when you can’t have someone you want.
If you’ve ever been head over heels for someone who doesn’t feel the same way, or maybe the relationship has run its course, and it’s time to move on. Letting go of feelings for someone isn’t always easy, but it’s definitely possible. Here are some steps you can take to gradually loosen those emotional ties and pave the way for new beginnings.
1. Acknowledge your feelings.
Source: Unsplash Don’t try to bury or ignore your feelings. It’s okay to feel sad, hurt, or even angry. Acknowledge the emotions you’re experiencing and give yourself permission to grieve the loss. Suppressing your emotions will only prolong the healing process.
2. Accept that it’s over.
This is often the hardest step, but it’s crucial for moving on. Accepting that the relationship is over or that the person doesn’t reciprocate your feelings allows you to begin the process of healing and letting go. It might be painful, but it’s a necessary step towards finding happiness again.
3. Create distance.
Source: Unsplash If possible, try to create some physical and emotional distance between yourself and the person you’re trying to get over. This might mean unfollowing them on social media, avoiding places you know they frequent, or simply taking a break from communication. Reducing contact can help you focus on yourself and break the emotional attachment.
4. Focus on yourself.
Source: Unsplash This is your time to rediscover your passions, interests, and goals. Engage in activities that bring you joy, spend time with people you love, and put your well-being first. Reconnect with yourself and rediscover the things that make you happy, independent of the other person.
5. Don’t idealise the past.
Source: Unsplash It’s easy to romanticise past relationships or focus on the positive aspects of the person you’re trying to forget. Remember that every relationship has its flaws, and try to see the situation realistically. Reflect on the reasons why the relationship didn’t work out or why you need to move on.
6. Talk to someone you trust.
Source: Unsplash Bottling up your emotions can make the healing process more difficult. Talk to a trusted friend, family member, therapist, or anyone who will listen without judgment. Sharing your feelings can provide a sense of relief and help you gain a fresh perspective on the situation.
7. Practice self-compassion.
Source: Unsplash Be kind to yourself during this process. Don’t beat yourself up for feeling sad or for taking time to heal. Remember that it’s okay to not be okay. Treat yourself with the same love and compassion you would offer a friend going through a similar situation.
8. Avoid rebounds.
Source: Unsplash Jumping into a new relationship right away might seem like a quick fix, but it can often hinder the healing process. Take the time to focus on yourself and process your emotions before getting involved with someone new. A rebound relationship can prevent you from fully healing and moving on in a healthy way.
9. Set boundaries.
Source: Unsplash If you need to maintain contact with the person, establish clear boundaries to protect yourself emotionally. Limit interactions, avoid discussing personal topics, and don’t engage in activities that might rekindle your feelings. These boundaries will help you create a safe space for yourself to heal and move forward.
10. Don’t blame yourself.
Source: Unsplash It’s easy to fall into the trap of self-blame, especially if the relationship ended badly or if your feelings weren’t reciprocated. Remember that love and attraction aren’t always within our control. Don’t dwell on what you could have done differently; focus instead on learning from the experience and moving forward with a stronger sense of self-worth.
11. Focus on the present and future.
Source: Unsplash Instead of dwelling on the past, focus on the present moment and the possibilities that the future holds. Set new goals, explore new interests, and embrace the opportunities that come your way. Redirect your energy towards creating a fulfilling life for yourself, independent of your past attachments.
12. Find healthy outlets for your emotions.
Source: Unsplash Whether it’s through journaling, exercise, creative expression, or simply talking to a friend, find healthy ways to process your emotions. Suppressing your feelings will only prolong the healing process. Allow yourself to feel the pain, but don’t let it consume you. Find healthy outlets that help you release your emotions and move forward.
13. Learn from the experience.
Source: Unsplash Every relationship, even the ones that end, teaches us something valuable about ourselves and what we want in a partner. Take the time to reflect on the lessons you’ve learned from this experience. What did you value in the relationship? What were the dealbreakers? Use this knowledge to make informed decisions about future relationships.
14. Be open to new possibilities.
Source: Unsplash Closing yourself off to love after a heartbreak is understandable, but it’s important to remember that there are plenty of fish in the sea. When you’re ready, be open to meeting new people and forming new connections. You might be surprised at the amazing people you encounter when you open your heart to new possibilities.
15. Celebrate your progress.
Source: Unsplash Letting go of feelings for someone takes time and effort. Celebrate even the smallest victories along the way. Whether it’s a day without thinking about them, a moment of clarity, or a newfound sense of self-love, acknowledge your progress and be proud of yourself for taking steps towards healing and moving on.
16. Remember, time heals all wounds.
Source: Unsplash While the pain might feel overwhelming now, remember that time is a powerful healer. The intensity of your feelings will gradually fade, and you’ll find yourself moving on and embracing new opportunities. Be patient with yourself, trust the process, and have faith that with time, you will heal and find happiness again.
