Medical gaslighting is when your symptoms, concerns, or instincts about your body get brushed off, downplayed, or dismissed by healthcare professionals.
Sadly, it’s more common than you might expect, especially if you’re a woman. In fact, a whopping 94.4% of women say they feel their concerns are often dismissed and ignored, leading to delayed treatment. However, it can happen across the board, and it leaves you feeling confused, embarrassed, or like you’re making it all up. If something feels off, and you’re not being taken seriously, these signs might help you recognise what’s really going on—and know what steps to take next.
You’re told it’s just anxiety.
One of the most common forms of medical gaslighting is being told your symptoms are simply down to anxiety. While mental health can absolutely affect the body, this explanation is sometimes thrown out too quickly—especially for women, younger people, and marginalised groups. It’s used as a catch-all without proper investigation.
If you keep hearing this without any real testing or discussion of physical causes, it might be a sign your concerns aren’t being taken seriously. You deserve a full picture, not a one-size-fits-all answer. Anxiety may be part of it, sure, but it shouldn’t be the first or only thing considered.
Your pain gets minimised or brushed off.
If you describe severe or ongoing pain and the response is more of a shrug than a strategy, that’s a red flag. You might be told it’s “not that bad,” “just normal,” or “something lots of people deal with.” Pain is subjective, but that doesn’t mean it’s imaginary, or that it should be ignored.
Medical professionals should be looking into what’s causing your pain, not comparing it to someone else’s or treating you like you’re exaggerating. If you feel like you’re constantly having to prove how much something hurts, that’s not okay.
You’re interrupted or talked over a lot.
If your GP or specialist regularly cuts you off, finishes your sentences, or shifts the conversation before you’ve explained the full story, that’s a sign they might not be listening with care. When you feel rushed or unheard, important details can get lost, and those could be key to your diagnosis.
Everyone deserves space to explain their symptoms clearly. If you’re constantly being steered in a direction you didn’t bring up, or if your concerns get redirected to something else entirely, it’s worth paying attention to that dynamic.
They seem annoyed or impatient with your questions.
If you ask for clarification and get a sigh, a sharp tone, or a vague dismissal, it can leave you feeling small or even guilty for speaking up. The thing is, asking questions about your health isn’t a hassle—it’s your right. A good doctor will welcome curiosity, not shame you for it.
That kind of response can discourage people from advocating for themselves. But your body, your experience, and your instincts all matter. A professional who makes you feel like you’re being a nuisance is doing you a disservice.
They rely on stereotypes instead of evidence.
If they make assumptions based on your age, weight, gender, or background instead of looking at your actual symptoms and history, that’s a major warning sign. Saying things like “That’s common in your age group” or “That’s just how women’s bodies are” without proper tests or follow-up isn’t a diagnosis—it’s lazy.
You’re not a walking statistic. You’re an individual with a specific experience. When healthcare providers rely on broad categories rather than proper assessment, it often leads to missed conditions, delayed treatment, and a lot of unnecessary suffering.
You’re not offered further testing.
When your symptoms are ongoing or worsening, and you’re repeatedly told there’s “nothing wrong,” yet no further testing is being done, it’s a serious red flag. Dismissing something just because it doesn’t show up on a basic blood test isn’t enough. Flighty reassurances might feel comforting in the moment, but if they’re not backed up by investigation, they’re not actually helpful. You deserve a proper workup, not just a pat on the shoulder and a prescription to go away.
You’re told to just wait it out, again and again.
Waiting and watching has its place. But if you’re stuck in a loop of “come back if it gets worse” without any treatment or plan in the meantime, something’s off. Chronic issues don’t disappear with enough patience—they usually get worse when ignored.
Being told to wait repeatedly without action can wear you down emotionally and physically. You don’t need to be on death’s door to deserve attention. If you’ve waited already and nothing’s improved, you need more than vague promises.
You start doubting your own memory or experience.
If you leave appointments feeling confused about what you actually said or what the doctor actually told you, that can be a sign of medical gaslighting. You might wonder if you’re remembering wrong, or feel like you’re losing confidence in your own story.
That second-guessing doesn’t come from nowhere. When someone repeatedly downplays your concerns or frames things in a way that makes you seem overreactive, it affects your sense of clarity. Trust that discomfort. It’s often telling you something’s off.
Your records don’t match your memory of the visit.
Sometimes you’ll read over your notes later and spot something odd, like symptoms you never mentioned, or a tone that doesn’t match how things actually went down. If what’s been recorded doesn’t feel true to your experience, that’s a concern. Inaccurate records can affect future care, and can be especially damaging if you need referrals or second opinions. It’s okay to ask for corrections or even bring your own notes to appointments. It’s not paranoid; it’s being proactive.
You feel relieved when someone finally believes you.
That massive sense of relief when a doctor says, “I believe you”—that shouldn’t be rare. However, for people who’ve experienced gaslighting in healthcare, it’s a gut-punch moment. Feeling seen for the first time highlights just how invisible you felt before.
If validation feels like a gift instead of a given, it probably means your concerns have been dismissed too often in the past. Medical care shouldn’t rely on luck or landing the “right” GP. You deserve consistent respect and belief from the start.
You’re made to feel guilty for seeking a second opinion
Getting a second opinion is smart, not disloyal. If a doctor reacts badly to this, or tries to make you feel like you’re overstepping or wasting time, that’s a worrying sign. Any confident, professional provider will be fine with you gathering more information.
Gaslighting often makes people second-guess what’s reasonable, but wanting another set of eyes on your case is absolutely fair, especially if your instincts are telling you something’s not right. You don’t need anyone’s permission to double-check your own health.
Your symptoms are written off as “normal” without context.
Some things are common, but that doesn’t mean they’re harmless. Just because lots of people have a particular symptom doesn’t mean it should be ignored. Telling you it’s “normal” to be exhausted all the time, or in pain during your cycle, isn’t good enough on its own.
When doctors skip the next step—asking why something is happening—that’s when things get missed. Gaslighting often hides in that casual shrug of “that’s just how it is.” However, your version of normal deserves a proper look, especially if it’s affecting your quality of life.
You’re made to feel dramatic for tracking your symptoms.
If you’ve been keeping notes, timelines, or photos to help explain what’s going on and the doctor rolls their eyes or dismisses it, that’s not a good sign. Tracking your health is responsible, not obsessive, and professionals should appreciate the effort, not ridicule it.
You’re allowed to be detailed. You’re allowed to care. When someone implies you’re being dramatic or difficult just because you’re informed, it usually says more about their discomfort than yours. Good care starts with good communication.
You’re scared to bring something up.
If you find yourself rehearsing your concerns or avoiding appointments altogether because you’re worried about being brushed off, that’s a powerful sign something isn’t right. Healthcare shouldn’t feel intimidating. You shouldn’t feel like you need to armour up before every visit.
This fear is often the end result of repeated invalidation. If this is your experience, it’s worth exploring new options, filing feedback, or switching practices. Your health isn’t up for debate, and you deserve a space where you can speak honestly without being shut down.
