Everyone disagrees at some point, but how you do it says a lot about the type of person you are.
No matter how ridiculous or unreasonable you feel the other person is being, you still need to be respectful when you’re arguing. If you do these things when you’re not seeing eye to eye with someone, it’s clear you’re a bit immature and act like a bit of a child.
1. You resort to name-calling.
When emotions run high, it’s tempting to lash out with hurtful labels or insults. However, resorting to name-calling immediately lowers the level of discourse and shifts the focus away from the actual issue at hand. It’s a clear sign of emotional immaturity and the inability to articulate your feelings or arguments effectively.
2. You use the silent treatment as a weapon.
Refusing to engage in communication and giving the silent treatment is a passive-aggressive tactic that solves nothing. Acting out like this points to an inability to face problems head-on and often leaves both people feeling frustrated and unheard. It’s a childish way of punishing the other person without addressing the real problem.
3. You bring up the past all the time.
Dredging up old arguments or unrelated past issues during a current disagreement is a classic derailing tactic. It shows an inability to focus on the present problem and often stems from a desire to deflect or gain an upper hand. This behaviour can make arguments spiral out of control and leave core issues unresolved.
4. You stomp off rather than staying and hashing things out.
Physically removing yourself from an argument by stomping away or slamming doors is the adult equivalent of a temper tantrum. While taking a breather can be healthy, dramatically exiting a conversation shows an inability to manage emotions and engage in mature dialogue. It often leaves the other person feeling dismissed and disrespected.
5. You refuse to admit when you’re wrong.
Stubbornly clinging to your position even when presented with clear evidence to the contrary is a sign of immaturity. The inability to admit mistakes or acknowledge different perspectives demonstrates a lack of self-awareness and emotional growth. It can lead to prolonged drama and damage trust in relationships.
6. You exaggerate things to make them sound worse than they are.
Using hyperbole or exaggerating the situation with phrases like “You always” or “You never” is a childish way of making your point. You’re trying to strengthen your argument, but it usually backfires by making your claims seem less credible and more emotionally driven than factual.
7. You play the victim card.
Constantly portraying yourself as the victim in every argument, regardless of the circumstances, is a manipulative tactic often seen in immature people. Doing this shifts responsibility away from yourself and can make the other person feel guilty for expressing their own concerns. There’s no way you can properly solve your problems when you refuse to take responsibility for your part in them.
8. Threats become your bargaining chip.
Resorting to threats, whether they’re about leaving a relationship, withholding affection, or other punitive measures, is a clear sign of emotional immaturity. Doing this proves you want to control the situation through fear rather than addressing the issue through open and honest communication. It can create a toxic dynamic in any relationship.
9. You engage in physical displays of frustration.
Throwing objects, punching walls, or other physical manifestations of anger during an argument are not only childish but potentially dangerous. These actions demonstrate a complete lack of emotional control and can be intimidating to other people. It’s a clear sign that you need to work on healthier ways of expressing and managing your emotions.
10. You interrupt rather than having a healthy debate.
Constantly cutting off the other person mid-sentence shows a lack of respect for their perspective and an inability to listen effectively. You clearly have a fear of losing control of the conversation or a belief that your points are more important. It turns discussions into competitions rather than opportunities for understanding.
11. You resort to mocking or mimicking.
Imitating the other person’s tone of voice, facial expressions, or mannerisms in a mocking way is incredibly juvenile. It’s not only disrespectful but also completely unproductive. It shows a lack of maturity in handling disagreements and often escalates issues rather than resolving them.
12. You use guilt-tripping to increase the likelihood of getting your way.
Attempting to manipulate the other person’s emotions by making them feel guilty is a childish way of gaining the upper hand. This often involves bringing up past favours or sacrifices unrelated to the current argument. It creates an unhealthy dynamic and avoids addressing the real issues at hand.
13. You refuse to stay on topic.
Constantly changing the subject or introducing irrelevant information when you’re losing an argument is a clear sign of immaturity. You’re clearly unable or unwilling to engage with tough topics, probably because you want to avoid accountability or admitting wrongdoing.
14. Sulking becomes your post-argument ritual.
Engaging in visible sulking or pouting after an argument, rather than working towards resolution, is childish behaviour. It’s an attempt to garner sympathy or make the other person feel bad for disagreeing with you. Passive-aggressive tactics like this just prolong the conflict and keep you from resolving things.
15. You resort to public shaming.
Taking private disagreements public by airing grievances on social media or involving uninvolved parties is incredibly immature. This shows a lack of respect for the other person’s privacy and often stems from a desire for validation from other people rather than genuine conflict resolution.
16. You use ultimatums as a negotiation tactic.
Issuing non-negotiable demands or ultimatums during arguments is a sign of emotional immaturity. Having such an all-or-nothing approach leaves no room for compromise or understanding the other person’s perspective. It often stems from a desire for control rather than a genuine interest in finding a mutually satisfactory solution.
17. You engage in competitive suffering.
Trying to one-up the other person’s grievances by claiming you have it worse is unproductive and childish. Your behaviour invalidates the other person’s feelings and turns the argument into a contest of who’s more miserable. It prevents genuine empathy and problem-solving.
18. You refuse to engage as a defence mechanism.
Completely shutting down or refusing to engage in necessary discussions is a form of emotional avoidance. While taking time to cool off can be healthy, consistently avoiding difficult conversations is immature. It shows an inability to handle conflict and can leave important issues unresolved, potentially damaging relationships in the long run.
