Growing up in an environment where physical punishment was used can leave its mark on you, not just physically, but mentally, too.
While the intent behind smacking may have been disciplinary, the effects on a child’s development can echo into adulthood in surprising ways. Research has repeatedly proven that it’s more harmful than beneficial, and while many people claim they survived the occasional smack as a child with no real damage done, that’s not the case for everyone. If you were smacked as a kid, you might notice certain traits or behaviours that stem from those experiences.
1. You may struggle with trust.
Source: Unsplash Physical punishment can make children feel unsafe and unsure of their environment. As an adult, you might find it hard to fully trust anyone or feel constantly on edge when it comes to emotional or physical safety, even in relationships that aren’t harmful.
2. You might have low self-esteem.
Being smacked as a child can lead to feelings of inadequacy, or not being “good enough.” These early experiences of physical punishment can stick with you, often causing you to second-guess your worth or constantly seek validation from other people in adulthood.
3. You could have issues with anger or frustration.
If you were smacked or hit as a child, you might have developed unhealthy ways to express anger or frustration. You may find yourself becoming easily irritated, or even turning to physical outbursts in difficult situations, as it was the response you saw when you were younger.
4. You may be terrified of confrontation.
Children who are smacked for misbehaviour often learn to avoid confrontation to escape punishment. As an adult, this can translate into refusing to have tough conversations or shying away from conflict, even when it’s necessary to address issues in relationships or at work.
5. You might struggle with boundaries.
If your boundaries were repeatedly disregarded as a child through physical punishment, you might have trouble setting healthy boundaries as an adult. It can affect relationships, both personal and professional, and make you more likely to tolerate disrespect or mistreatment.
6. You could experience anxiety or nervousness.
The unpredictability of being smacked as a child—never knowing when or why it might happen—can lead to anxiety later in life. As an adult, you might feel tense in situations where you’re unsure of the outcome or when you’re waiting for something to go wrong, as that was the environment you grew up in.
7. You might have trouble expressing emotions.
In environments where physical punishment is common, emotional expression can be stifled. If you were taught to suppress emotions, you might find it difficult to express how you truly feel as an adult. It can lead to emotional outbursts or feeling misunderstood in relationships.
8. You may feel a need for control.
Children who are smacked may develop a heightened sense of needing control over their environment to feel safe. The need for control can extend into adulthood, where you may find yourself overly meticulous or anxious about things being “just right.”
9. You could have a higher tolerance for pain.
Being smacked as a child might condition you to tolerate physical pain more than others. As an adult, you might brush off physical discomfort or even find it difficult to admit when you’re in pain, as it was something you learned to endure during childhood.
10. You may have an innate distrust of authority figures.
If your experience with authority figures (like parents or teachers) involved physical punishment, you may grow up with a mistrust of authority. Whether it’s a boss, a police officer, or any figure of power, you might struggle with their presence or authority, finding it hard to respect their role.
11. You might experience a fear of failure.
Physical punishment often comes after mistakes or failures, causing the child to internalise fear around making mistakes. As an adult, you may become paralysed by the thought of failure or avoid trying new things altogether, afraid of the consequences or judgment you might face.
12. You likely have a heightened sense of empathy.
Having experienced the emotional pain of being smacked, you may have developed a deeper empathy for other people who are struggling. While this can be a positive trait, it can also lead to emotional exhaustion if you don’t learn to set boundaries and care for your own emotional well-being.
13. You may feel disconnected from your parents.
Experiencing physical punishment can lead to a fractured relationship with parents, making it harder to feel emotionally connected as an adult. Such intense emotional distance can manifest as a sense of detachment or unresolved tension in your adult relationships with them.
14. You might become overly protective of your own children.
If you were smacked as a child, you may become fiercely protective of your own children, wanting to shield them from the same treatment. The desire to prevent harm can sometimes result in overprotectiveness, where you’re overly cautious and anxious about your children’s well-being.
