The US and the UK are pretty similar in many ways, but there are some cultural gaps that are tough to bridge.
Having read a lot of our cultural content, reader Alyssa, who’s 33 and originally from Boston, wrote in to share her story about moving to Manchester all the way from the States to take on an exciting new job. While she’s settled in nicely and is happy to be here, she admitted that she’s had some pretty interesting experiences since moving over that have pointed out just how different Americans go on than we Brits do.
“I moved from Boston to the UK three years ago and, let me tell you, the culture shock wasn’t about driving on the other side of the road or suddenly calling ‘pants’ something else entirely—it was the little things,” Alyssa told us. “The everyday stuff, things I’d never questioned growing up in the US, suddenly felt like overreactions when seen through a British lens. It’s not that Brits don’t care—it’s more that they just… don’t make a fuss. Ever. And that contrast has been hilarious, humbling, and weirdly refreshing.”
“There are things I’ve spent my whole life treating as big deals, only to realise they barely register over here. I’ve slowly adjusted, but every now, and then I’ll catch myself reacting with full-blown American enthusiasm or worry, only to be met with a quiet ‘Right, well…’ and a shrug,” she added. These are just some of the differences she’s noticed between the two cultures—and to be fair, we have, too!
1. Saying “I love you” casually
In the US, it’s totally normal to say “love you” to friends, family, your dog, or even your barista if you’re in a good mood. In the UK, it’s used more sparingly—and usually after you’ve built a proper emotional rapport.
It’s not that Brits don’t feel deeply, we’re just a bit more reserved with saying it out loud. I learned pretty quickly that dropping “love ya!” at the end of a phone call gets you a slightly startled pause, followed by a polite but confused “Right… talk soon.”
2. Making a big deal out of birthdays
Back in the US, Alyssa says, birthdays are practically a personal holiday—balloons, themed parties, a crown at brunch, the works. Here, it’s more of a “fancy a pint?” situation, with maybe a card if you’re lucky.
It’s not that we don’t celebrate, but the whole “it’s my birthday week!” attitude just doesn’t translate over here. Over-celebrating your own birthday might get you a sarcastic eyebrow raise or a cheeky comment about needing attention.
3. Customer service expectations
In the US, the customer is always right, and they’ll probably be checked on five times during a meal. Here in the UK, you might have to go find someone to pay the bill—and that’s not considered rude.
It took Alyssa ages to stop thinking she was being ignored when she wasn’t constantly asked if she was “still working on that.” We Brits tend to prefer a more hands-off approach, and it feels more relaxed once you get used to it.
4. Tipping culture
Americans will tip for almost anything, and they tip big. Brits, not so much. A 10-12.5% service charge might be included, or maybe you toss in a couple of quid if the service was great, but no one’s chasing down waiters with extra cash.
Alyssa says she still feels a bit guilty not leaving a massive tip, but she realises that it’s not expected and can even be awkward if you overdo it. “The first time I left 20%, the server looked genuinely confused,” she remembered.
5. Discussing money openly
In the US, talking about how much you paid for your house, your job offer, or your student loans is normal. In the UK, that kind of chat is borderline taboo. Alyssa once mentioned how much she paid in rent during a casual conversation, and the silence was… chilling. Brits are happy to talk about the weather or your dog’s name, but not your salary.
6. Getting visibly emotional in public
Americans are known for expressive reactions—happy tears, big hugs, shouting across the street to greet a friend. Here, that kind of public display gets a bit of side-eye and maybe a concerned glance. Brits are more understated, even in emotional moments. Crying in public feels way more private here, like something that’s supposed to happen quietly and definitely not on the Tube.
7. Being super enthusiastic
Over in the US, being excited is encouraged—you can shout about your new job, rave about brunch, and high-five a stranger. In the UK, too much enthusiasm gets met with a polite but puzzled “Calm down, dear.” It’s not that Brits aren’t excited—we just show it differently. Where Americans might say, “Oh my God, that’s AMAZING,” we’ll nod and say “That’s quite good.” It means we’re impressed… in a very subtle way.
8. The obsession with ice
Americans love their drinks ice-cold. Every restaurant in the US gives you a giant glass packed with cubes. In the UK, if your drink comes with more than two ice cubes, it’s a miracle—or an accident. “As someone who likes drinks frigid, this has been hard to adjust to,” Alyssa admits. “But apparently, lukewarm beverages are just a thing here. I’ve learned to embrace ‘slightly cool’ as a vibe.
9. Making small talk with strangers
Americans will chat to anyone, anywhere. Queues, lifts, public toilets—it’s all fair game. Brits? Nope. There’s an unspoken rule that you keep to yourself unless you’re introduced. The first few times she tried to strike up a friendly convo in a shop queue, Alyssa says she got polite smiles and then total silence. “Lesson learned: head down, mind your business, and keep your chit-chat for your friends,” she says.
10. Over-apologising (in reverse)
In the US, saying sorry is usually reserved for actual mistakes. Brits, on the other hand, apologise for everything—bumping into someone, walking too slowly, existing. Alyssa has adopted this habit now, too, without even realising it at first. “I once apologised to a door I walked into,” she confesses. “It’s strangely contagious and kind of charming, even if I now say sorry a dozen times a day.”
11. Big holiday decorations
From inflatable Halloween pumpkins to synchronised Christmas light shows, Americans go all out for holidays (the actual kind, not vacation). Over here, things are a little more… restrained. There are decorations, of course, but they’re more subtle. A tasteful wreath, maybe a string of lights. Alyssa once suggested a Halloween costume party and got asked if she was a child.
12. Openly celebrating personal success
Americans are taught to own their wins—graduations, promotions, personal milestones. Brits, meanwhile, lean toward humility, sometimes to a fault. Bragging is not a national sport here. If you announce a big achievement, it’ll likely be met with a low-key “Nice one” or a nod. There’s pride, sure—it’s just understated. You learn to read between the lines.
13. Having “too much” confidence
In the US, confidence is encouraged, even expected. Brits often see overt confidence as bordering on arrogance. You’re better off downplaying things here; it makes people more comfortable. Alyssa has taken this to heart and adjusted accordingly. “I’ve learned to keep the ‘I crushed it!’ energy to a minimum and go for a more self-deprecating ‘I gave it a go,'” she explains. Turns out, modesty is the UK’s favourite social currency.
Got a personal story, strong opinion, or cultural take you want to share? Send your pitch to [email protected]—we’d love to hear from you.
