Trust is a fundamental component of any healthy relationship, whether personal or professional.
However, some people do things that should raise serious red flags. Here are 18 shady behaviours of people you should be cautious about trusting in life.
1. They consistently tell small lies.
People who habitually lie about minor things are likely to be dishonest about more significant matters. These small lies might seem inconsequential, but they reveal a comfort with deception. If someone regularly embellishes stories or fabricates excuses, it’s a sign that truthfulness isn’t their priority.
2. They gossip non-stop about anyone and everyone.
Those who frequently engage in negative gossip are likely to talk about you behind your back as well. This behaviour shows a lack of respect for people’s privacy and a tendency to betray confidences. Be wary of people who seem to thrive on spreading rumours or sharing other people’s personal business.
3. They never admit fault or apologise.
People who can’t take responsibility for their mistakes or apologise when they’re wrong often lack integrity. This behaviour indicates an unwillingness to be accountable for their actions. It can also suggest a tendency to manipulate situations to avoid blame, which is inherently untrustworthy.
4. They’re inconsistent in their words and actions.
Pay attention to people whose actions don’t align with their words. If someone repeatedly makes promises they don’t keep or espouses values they don’t live by, it’s a clear sign of untrustworthiness. Consistency between words and actions is a hallmark of integrity.
5. They pressure you to share personal information quickly.
Be cautious of people who push for intimate details or confidential information early in a relationship. This behaviour can be a manipulation tactic to gain leverage or create a false sense of closeness. Trustworthy people respect boundaries and allow relationships to develop naturally.
6. They’re overly charming or flattering.
Source: Unsplash While charm isn’t inherently negative, excessive flattery or charm, especially early in a relationship, can be a red flag. This behaviour might be an attempt to manipulate your emotions or cloud your judgment. Be wary of those who seem too good to be true — they often are.
7. They have a history of betraying people’s trust.
If someone has a track record of betraying friends, partners, or colleagues, take note. Past behaviour is often the best predictor of future actions. While people can change, a pattern of breaking trust is a serious warning sign.
8. They’re secretive about their past or personal life.
While everyone has a right to privacy, extreme secrecy about one’s background or current circumstances can be suspicious. If someone is evasive about basic personal information or their past, it might indicate they have something to hide.
9. They frequently play the victim.
People who consistently portray themselves as victims in every situation often lack accountability. This behaviour can be a manipulation tactic to gain sympathy and avoid responsibility. It also suggests a tendency to distort reality, which is inherently untrustworthy.
10. They have mood swings or are unpredictable.
Source: Unsplash Extreme mood swings or unpredictable behaviour can make someone unreliable and potentially untrustworthy. If you never know which version of a person you’ll encounter, it’s difficult to establish trust. Emotional stability is an important component of trustworthiness.
11. They invade your privacy without remorse.
Be cautious of people who don’t respect your personal boundaries. This might involve snooping through your phone, reading your private messages, or sharing your personal information without permission. Such behaviour shows a lack of respect and trustworthiness.
12. They’re always looking for shortcuts or ways to cheat the system.
People who consistently try to bend rules or find loopholes may have a flexible moral code. While innovation is positive, a constant search for shortcuts, especially at other people’s expense, suggests a lack of integrity. This behaviour can indicate they might not hesitate to betray your trust if it benefits them.
13. They’re intensely jealous or possessive.
Excessive jealousy or possessiveness often stems from insecurity and can lead to controlling behaviour. This trait can manifest as constant suspicion, attempts to isolate you from other people, or unreasonable demands for your time and attention. This just destroys trust and can be emotionally manipulative.
14. They have a superiority complex.
People who consistently belittle people or act superior are often compensating for their own insecurities. This behaviour can lead to dishonesty as they try to maintain their perceived status. It also suggests a lack of empathy and respect for other people, which are crucial components of trustworthiness.
15. They’re overly defensive when questioned.
If someone reacts with extreme defensiveness to simple questions or mild criticism, it might indicate they have something to hide. Trustworthy people are generally open to honest communication and can handle questioning without becoming overly agitated or defensive.
16. They have a pattern of unstable relationships.
While everyone has past relationship challenges, a consistent pattern of dramatic, short-lived relationships can be a red flag. This might indicate difficulty maintaining trust and healthy boundaries. It could also suggest a tendency to prioritise short-term gains over long-term trustworthiness.
17. They pressure you to make quick decisions.
Be wary of those who consistently push you to make important decisions without giving you time to think. This behaviour often indicates they’re prioritising their interests over yours. Trustworthy people respect your need for time and space to make informed decisions.
18. They have different personas for different social groups.
While it’s normal to change how you act slightly in different social contexts, be cautious of those who seem to have radically different personalities depending on who they’re with. This chameleon-like behaviour can point to a lack of authenticity and a willingness to manipulate their image to suit their needs, which undermines trustworthiness.
