When it comes to dating and relationships, plenty of women have been led to believe that certain behaviours or habits will make them more attractive to men.
Whether it’s advice from magazines, social media, or outdated stereotypes, some of these efforts are actually unnecessary, or even counterproductive. Many of the things women do to impress men aren’t as effective as they think, and in some cases, they can even backfire. These things usually don’t work the way you might expect.
1. Pretending to love everything he likes
Some women try to impress a man by mirroring all of his interests, suddenly becoming a die-hard fan of his favourite football team or claiming to love his favourite music even if they don’t. While showing interest in his hobbies is great, completely erasing your own tastes won’t make you more attractive. Most men appreciate honesty and individuality, not someone who just agrees with everything they say.
2. Dressing in a way that feels uncomfortable
There’s a lot of pressure to wear certain clothes or dress in a way that’s perceived as “sexy” to impress men. However, if you feel awkward, uncomfortable, or not like yourself, it usually shows. Confidence is far more attractive than any particular outfit. If you’re constantly adjusting your clothes or feeling self-conscious, it’s not going to have the effect you’re hoping for.
3. Playing hard to get
There’s a common belief that acting distant or making someone “chase” you will make them more interested. While a little mystery can be fun, outright playing games can get exhausting and frustrating. Many men prefer directness over mind games. If someone likes you, they want to know you’re interested too — constantly being unavailable or sending mixed signals can just make them lose interest.
4. Pretending to be low-maintenance
Some women go out of their way to prove they’re “not like other girls” by downplaying their needs, preferences, or emotions to seem easygoing. They might act as if they never get upset, always go with the flow, or never need anything. While being adaptable is great, constantly suppressing your feelings to seem “cool” isn’t sustainable. Healthy relationships thrive on honesty, and most men respect someone who knows what they want and isn’t afraid to express it.
5. Over-the-top flirting
Some women assume that exaggerating their flirting — constant giggling, overly dramatic reactions, or forced physical contact — will win a man over. But if it feels unnatural, it can come across as insincere or even a little awkward. Genuine connection and effortless chemistry are far more attractive than forced flirting. If you’re trying too hard, it often has the opposite effect.
6. Talking badly about other women
Trying to impress a man by putting other women down, whether it’s an ex, a colleague, or even a celebrity, isn’t as appealing as some people think. It might seem like a way to make yourself stand out, but it often just comes across as mean-spirited. Most men prefer women who are confident without needing to tear anyone down. A little lighthearted competition is one thing, but constant negativity about other women is rarely attractive.
7. Acting like you have no expectations
Source: Unsplash There’s an idea that having no expectations will make you more appealing because you seem chill and easygoing. Some women avoid discussing their relationship goals or desires out of fear of scaring a man away. But men aren’t mind readers. If you don’t communicate what you want, you could end up in a situation where your needs aren’t met. A confident woman who knows what she wants is far more attractive than someone afraid to ask for it.
8. Laughing at all his jokes, even the bad ones
Source: Unsplash Of course, everyone appreciates someone who enjoys their sense of humour, but there’s no need to force laughter at every joke just to boost his ego. Genuine laughter is great, but pretending everything he says is hilarious can come off as insincere. Most men appreciate a real reaction over someone just trying to stroke their confidence.
9. Over-editing social media photos
Source: Unsplash Posting carefully curated, highly edited photos to get his attention might make an impression online, but it’s not what builds a real connection. If he’s drawn to an unrealistic version of you, it can create unnecessary pressure to maintain that image. Confidence in your real self will always be more attractive than trying to look “perfect.” Plus, most men don’t scrutinise photos as much as people think — chances are, he already likes how you naturally look.
10. Playing the damsel in distress
Source: Unsplash There’s a common stereotype that men like to feel needed, so some women exaggerate their helplessness, acting clueless about simple things or pretending they can’t do tasks they’re perfectly capable of handling. While men do like to feel useful, they also appreciate competence and confidence. Pretending to be helpless when you’re not can feel disingenuous, and in the long run, it’s more attractive to be independent and capable.
11. Talking excessively about how much attention you get
Source: Unsplash Bragging about how many men are interested in you, how many DMs you get, or how much people hit on you might seem like a way to boost your appeal, but it often does the opposite. Instead of making you seem desirable, it can come across as trying too hard for validation. Confidence is attractive, but constantly seeking external approval can be a turn-off.
12. Changing your personality to fit his preferences
Source: Unsplash Some women think that adjusting their personality to match what they think a man wants, whether that’s being extra bubbly, more serious, or pretending to be introverted or extroverted, will make them more appealing. But real attraction comes from authenticity. If you change yourself to fit what you think someone wants, it’s exhausting, and sooner or later, your real personality will come through anyway.
13. Agreeing with everything he says
Source: Unsplash Nodding along to every opinion he has might seem like a way to build a connection, but it doesn’t create real chemistry. Men respect women who have their own thoughts and perspectives. A little friendly debate or difference in opinion can actually be more attractive than always agreeing just to keep the peace. It shows you have your own identity and interests.
14. Trying too hard to be “not like other girls”
Source: Unsplash Some women go out of their way to set themselves apart by claiming they “hate drama,” “only have guy friends,” or “aren’t into girly things” to impress a man. But dismissing other women or trying to prove you’re somehow better than them doesn’t make you more appealing; it just makes you seem insecure. Being yourself without trying to fit into a certain “type” is far more attractive.
