If you feel like people take a wide berth from you, you might be wondering what’s going on.
You think you’re alright, so why do so many people seem to have a problem with you — or outright not like you? While you likely have plenty of positive traits, these negative behaviours are overshadowing them. If you’re guilty of any of these, you’ll want to change your approach if you want to be seen as likeable.
1. You dominate conversations without realising it.
Source: Unsplash If you tend to talk a lot and rarely let anyone else get a word in, it can make people feel unheard. Conversations should be a two-way street. Try zipping your lips a bit more often and letting other people share their thoughts, so it feels more balanced.
2. You always bring the conversation back to yourself.
It’s easy to slip into the habit of making everything about you, but this can leave people feeling like their experiences don’t matter. Focus on showing interest in what other people are saying, and ask questions to keep them involved.
3. You don’t respect personal space.
Everyone has different comfort levels when it comes to personal space. If you stand too close or invade someone’s physical boundaries, it can make them uncomfortable. Pay attention to body language and give people the space they need to feel at ease.
4. You constantly complain.
While everyone needs to vent sometimes, being overly negative can be draining for those around you. If you’re always complaining, people might start to avoid you. Try to balance your complaints with some positivity or solutions to problems.
5. You’re unreliable.
People tend to avoid those who don’t keep their promises or flake out last minute. If you’re often cancelling plans or not following through on commitments, it can break trust. Being reliable shows respect for other people’s time and builds stronger connections.
6. You don’t listen properly.
If people feel like you’re not really listening when they talk, it can push them away. Listening isn’t just about hearing words—it’s about showing that you understand and care. Make an effort to fully engage in conversations, and respond thoughtfully.
7. You interrupt people mid-sentence.
Interrupting someone while they’re speaking can make them feel disrespected or ignored. Even if you have something important to say, wait until they’ve finished before jumping in. It shows that you value what they’re sharing.
8. You gossip about people too much.
Constantly talking about other people’s business can create an atmosphere of distrust. If you’re always gossiping, people might wonder if you’ll do the same about them. Focus on uplifting conversations rather than spreading negative talk.
9. You rarely show appreciation.
Source: Unsplash People like to feel appreciated, and if you’re not acknowledging people’s efforts or kindness, they might feel taken for granted. Whether it’s a simple thank you or showing gratitude for their time, small gestures go a long way.
10. You’re overly critical.
If you constantly criticise people or point out their flaws, it can make them feel judged and uncomfortable. No one enjoys being around someone who’s constantly nitpicking. Try focusing on positives and offering constructive feedback only when necessary.
11. You make everything a competition.
It’s great to have a competitive spirit, but if you’re always turning conversations into a contest, it can get tiring for people. Constant one-upping can make people feel like they can’t just relax around you. Let go of the need to win and enjoy more laid-back interactions.
12. You’re too pushy with your opinions.
Source: Unsplash It’s fine to have strong beliefs, but pushing your opinions onto people can make them feel pressured or judged. Be open to hearing different perspectives without trying to force yours onto everyone else.
13. You avoid talking about feelings.
Source: Unsplash If you shy away from emotional conversations or dismiss how people feel, it can create distance. People value emotional connections, and avoiding these conversations can make you seem cold or disconnected. Be willing to open up and listen when other people share their feelings.
14. You don’t admit when you’re wrong.
Source: Unsplash No one’s perfect, and owning up to mistakes is an important part of maintaining healthy relationships. If you never admit fault or apologise, it can make people feel frustrated. Showing humility and taking responsibility helps repair any harm caused.
15. You don’t respect people’s time.
Source: Unsplash If you’re consistently late or make people wait on you, it sends the message that you don’t value their time. Being mindful of schedules and showing up on time is a simple way to show respect and consideration.
16. You ignore social cues.
Source: Unsplash Social cues, like body language and tone, are important in understanding how people feel. If you miss these signals, you might come off as insensitive or unaware. Paying attention to subtle hints can help you navigate conversations more smoothly.
17. You hold on to grudges.
Source: Unsplash Holding on to past issues can create tension and distance between you and other people. Letting go of grudges shows maturity and makes it easier to move forward. People are more likely to stick around when they know you can forgive and forget.
