We all crave authenticity and want to live a life that’s true to ourselves.
But sometimes, we get caught up in other people’s expectations, societal pressures, or our own insecurities, leading us down a path of pretence and self-deception. If you’ve been feeling a nagging sense of emptiness or disconnect, it might be time to examine whether you’re living a lie. Here are 15 signs that you might be faking your way through life.
1. You feel a constant need to impress everyone.
Whether it’s through your job, your possessions, or your social circle, you’re always trying to project an image of success and happiness, even if it’s not the reality. You carefully curate your social media posts, exaggerate your accomplishments, and downplay your struggles. This constant need for external validation can be exhausting and ultimately unfulfilling, as it leaves you feeling empty and disconnected from your true self.
2. You’re afraid to be vulnerable and show your true emotions.
You put on a brave face, plaster on a smile, and pretend that everything is fine, even when it’s not. You fear that showing your true feelings will make you appear weak or vulnerable, so you bottle them up and put on a facade of strength. But this emotional suppression can take a toll on your mental and physical health, and it prevents you from forming genuine connections.
3. You constantly compare yourself to other people and feel inadequate.
You scroll through social media, compare your life to other people’s seemingly perfect lives, and feel like you’re constantly falling short. You measure your worth by external standards, like your income, your appearance, or your social status, rather than your intrinsic value as a human being. This constant comparison can lead to feelings of inadequacy, jealousy, and self-doubt, which can further fuel the cycle of pretence.
4. You feel like you’re wearing a mask and hiding your true self.
You’ve become so adept at playing a role that you’ve lost touch with who you really are. You feel like you’re constantly performing for an audience, whether it’s your family, friends, or colleagues. You say the things you think people want to hear, act in ways that are expected of you, and suppress your own desires and dreams. This lack of authenticity can leave you feeling lost, confused, and disconnected from your own purpose.
5. You’re living a life that doesn’t align with your values and priorities.
Source: Unsplash You’ve chosen a career path, a relationship, or a lifestyle that doesn’t truly resonate with you. You’re going through the motions, but you feel a nagging sense of emptiness and dissatisfaction. You’re not living a life that’s aligned with your core values, passions, and goals, and it’s taking a toll on your happiness and well-being.
6. You’re constantly chasing external validation and approval.
Source: Unsplash You rely on other people to tell you that you’re good enough, smart enough, or worthy of love and respect. You crave compliments, likes on social media, and external validation for your choices and actions. But this external validation is fleeting and can never fill the void that comes from a lack of self-love and self-acceptance.
7. You have a hard time saying “no” and setting boundaries.
Source: Unsplash You people-please at your own expense, overcommit yourself, and neglect your own needs. You fear that saying “no” will make you seem selfish or uncooperative, so you say “yes” even when you don’t want to. This lack of boundaries can lead to resentment, burnout, and a loss of self-respect.
8. You feel like a fraud and worry about being “found out.”
Source: Unsplash You have a nagging feeling that you’re not good enough, smart enough, or successful enough, and you fear that people will eventually discover your shortcomings. This imposter syndrome can be paralysing, preventing you from taking risks, pursuing your dreams, and living your life to the fullest.
9. Your happiness is dependent on external factors.
Source: Unsplash You believe that happiness comes from external sources, like money, possessions, status, or relationships. You chase after these things, hoping that they will finally bring you fulfilment and contentment. But true happiness comes from within, from self-acceptance, gratitude, and living a life that’s aligned with your values and purpose. It’s not something that can be bought or acquired through external means.
10. You feel like you’re constantly putting on an act.
Source: Unsplash You’re always “on,” performing for an audience, even when you’re alone. You worry about what other people think of you, how you look, and what you say. This constant need to perform can be exhausting and prevents you from being your authentic self. It’s okay to let your guard down, be vulnerable, and show your true colours to the world.
11. You’re afraid to make mistakes or fail.
Source: Unsplash You see failure as a sign of weakness or inadequacy, so you avoid taking risks or stepping outside your comfort zone. You stick to the familiar and avoid challenges, but this fear of failure can hold you back from achieving your full potential. Mistakes are opportunities for growth and learning, and embracing them can lead to unexpected breakthroughs and new opportunities.
12. You have a hard time being alone with your own thoughts.
Source: Unsplash You constantly look for distractions, whether it’s through social media, Netflix, or other forms of entertainment. You’re afraid of silence and solitude, as it forces you to confront your own thoughts and feelings. But being alone with yourself is essential for self-reflection, introspection, and personal growth. It allows you to connect with your inner wisdom and gain clarity about what truly matters to you.
13. You feel like you’re not living up to your full potential.
Source: Unsplash You have a nagging feeling that you’re capable of more, but you’re not sure how to tap into your full potential. You feel stuck in a rut, unfulfilled, and uninspired. This feeling of stagnation can be a sign that you’re not living a life that’s aligned with your passions and purpose. It’s time to explore your interests, take risks, and pursue the things that light you up.
14. You feel a sense of disconnect between your inner and outer worlds.
Source: Unsplash The person you present to the world is not the same person you are on the inside. You feel like you’re living a double life, with a public persona that masks your true feelings, thoughts, and desires. This disconnect can lead to feelings of isolation, loneliness, and a loss of self-identity. It’s important to bridge the gap between your inner and outer worlds by embracing authenticity and living a life that’s true to who you are.
15. You’re constantly looking for the next “fix” to feel happy.
Source: Unsplash Whether it’s a new relationship, a shopping spree, or a night out on the town, you’re always looking for something external to make you feel good. But this constant pursuit of happiness is a never-ending cycle, as external sources of pleasure are fleeting and can never truly fill the void within. True happiness comes from cultivating inner peace, self-love, and gratitude for the present moment.
